The more you make it a big deal, the more the kid makes it a big deal. And this woman (she is in college, right?) made it a big deal.
I'm not an idiot, or a callous person. I'm a recovered anorexic and there no explanation that I've encountered that telling someone to "grab a shoe, princess," would cause a full blown eating disorder. The causes of eating disorders are varied, nuanced and deeply rooted in control issues. I am able to identify children at potential risk, have done so and spoken to parents before, but again she is not a child.
I do think flyers have been made to be the stars of this sport, whether we like it or not- and I don't like it, either as a flyer and as a coach. So when a princess comes in the boards, or comes to me in class, and says "why aren't I flying anymore, basing is so hard and I love being the star" you better believe I am going to shut that down fast. The bigger a deal you make out of it, the bigger a deal it is to them. I'm not completely insensitive and I keep an eye on the kids I coach, and talk to them (and their parents) if necessary. But if you're an adult who can't talk to your coach and come to a forum asking for opinions on why you can no longer be the star? Ughhh. Get over it and grab a dang shoe.