All-Star Coaches - Great Cheerleader But Drama Mamma, Sadder To See Them Leave Or Better They Stay.

[SharkDad]

I will agree that a child/parent/gym can not prevent a crowd and/or media that comes specifically to watch an extremely talented child. What gym owners/coaches can prevent, and what I was speaking of above, is a gym giving obvious special treatment to that child. To me, that is a "mentality". An example would be having that specific child always coming out first on stage, with the team lingering a second or two behind them, and then lingering after the rest of the team has left the stage blowing kisses and waving to the crowd. Our gym owners/coaches refuse to profide that type of, for lack of a better word, "cheerlebrity" treatment.

I can see where you are going with that. But if you don't know why a gym or that person does what they do, why question their motives? Maybe to them that is normal or they are playing to that team/gym's fans?

 

[creator13]

My opinion would be remove the mom. Butt drama mommas are like cancer, they spread fast if not treated.

 

[ChoreographyInTheBack]

I don't have any input on removing them/ allowing them to stay but on the subject of Mama Drama..

I know it's annoying for coaches and I feel badly for them. I wish we didn't have this problem at all.. But, to be honest, I like that it gives me some entertainment after practice and at competitions.. :enjoyshow:

 

[cupieqt]

BlueCat once said, and I heartily agree, that allowing "bad customers" to stay will hurt your program more than you realize.

 

[JulieP]

Unfortunately I blame the coaches for inflating both the cheerleader's and parent's heads to make then think they are more important than the rest of the team. And once a coach allows a special priviledge - even a small one - it's all downhill from there. You know what they say, you can never go back to just holding hands....

I would say that, more often than not, the parents/kids that think they're more important than everyone else have created that fabrication for themselves. I can't count the number of times that parents have over-exaggerated their child's abilities when starting at our gym. I have had kids who "almost have their BHS on floor" that can't even do a bridge or backbend, but someone threw them down a wedge mat once so now they "almost have" the skill. I'm sorry, but there are countless parents who believe that Susie is better than everyone without any input/suggestion from me. :eek:

 

[BlueCat]

BlueCat once said, and I heartily agree, that allowing "bad customers" to stay will hurt your program more than you realize.

A constantly negative parent is like cancer for your gym. They will eventually run off many customers.

 

[cheermommaRN]

Nothing spoils a season faster than cheer mom drama. It creates a toxic environment and is the one reason I don't mind closed practices!

 

[catlady]

I can see where you are going with that. But if you don't know why a gym or that person does what they do, why question their motives? Maybe to them that is normal or they are playing to that team/gym's fans?

My comment was directed to the question on "mama drama". I believe those owners/coaches that allow drama and encourage certain behaviors, will have it. Our owners/coaches direct their attention to the score sheet, how to create the strongest overall team, and unity on that team. The owner makes it very clear, behave yourself and you may stay and watch, create drama and you and your child will be asked to leave no matter how wonderful they are. My comment on "Cheerlebrity" mentality is only that our gym owner won't cater to it nor will they promote it, because they feel it is detrimental to unity of the team and it fuels the fire for "drama". That does not mean that those talented children aren't recognized outside of our gym by a fan base or by the media. The topic at hand was "drama mama's", I never questioned any gym's motives, I merely stated our gym will not cater to it.

 

[cheernerd5678]

No cheerleader, no matter how wonderful, is worth putting up with mama drama. Our girls began cheer in Missouri and I quickly pulled them from the sport. There were moms yelling through the glass at the coaches, "Get that kid off that team, they don't even have a ......." "I'm going to pull my child if they aren't the point......" blah, blah, blah.

Where did you cheer in Missouri?? Not going to get defensive, just wondering b/c that's where I live :D

 

[poofofsecrets]

At my gym, if the girl is really talented but the mom is crazy they just ask the mom to stop creating drama and that if there is a problem to come talk to the coaches immediately before telling everyone about it. Parents aren't allowed at practice so they are not usually a problem.

 

[just_kay_today]

I believe that parity, and open communication with your customers goes a long way towards avoiding drama. If the handbook has a rule it should applied to every child, and every family no matter who they are. When changes need to be made concerning your child, communication is key. People want to be treated with common courtesy. Parents are passionate about their kids. Nothing hurts worse than watching your child work really hard for something, only to see another child walk into it because the coach "loves" her and her family. It sends a bad message to the child, and negates what we all tell our kids...that hard work is the only way to achieve anything worthwhile. The drama isn't always initiated by the mama. The gym's culture has a great deal to do with it.

 

[addicted2cheer]

one rotten apple ruins the bunch.. cut that parent out like a cancer.. Let her be an example to the rest of the mom's so they'll all behave! :p coaches.. don't let it get tot he point that that parents have to take things into their own hands, bad behavior not addressed is a message to other parents that it's tolerated.

 

[12stepCheermom]

I believe that parity, and open communication with your customers goes a long way towards avoiding drama. If the handbook has a rule it should applied to every child, and every family no matter who they are. When changes need to be made concerning your child, communication is key. People want to be treated with common courtesy. Parents are passionate about their kids. Nothing hurts worse than watching your child work really hard for something, only to see another child walk into it because the coach "loves" her and her family. It sends a bad message to the child, and negates what we all tell our kids...that hard work is the only way to achieve anything worthwhile. The drama isn't always initiated by the mama. The gym's culture has a great deal to do with it.

I have to give a high five to this from a leadership perspective. I don't own a gym, I was never a cheerleader and don't know half of what our coaches know about the industry. But, I know about leadership. I'm almost through a doctorate in it for heaven's sake.

If there is a vacuum of communication from the coaching staff to the parents, parents will make up, assume or create their own answers for the questions that are not being answered by someone who knows what the answers actually are. If the ownership and coaches are not OVERLY communicative, open to parents (even though there are dramatic ones in the bunch), and freely accessible, you only feed the drama demon....which makes you want to deal with parents less....which cuts off communication...and stirs the ever swirling toilet bowl of doom.

"In the absence of true leadership people will listen to anyone that steps up to the plate" (give you a cookie if you got that movie reference) but entirely true...and drama mammas live to be the font of all gym knowledge. If the coaching staff isn't specifically communicating the REAL message....the drama mammas will not only take over...they will multiply.

You can do the rest of the math for yourselves.

 

[5-6-7-8]

I have to give a high five to this from a leadership perspective. I don't own a gym, I was never a cheerleader and don't know half of what our coaches know about the industry. But, I know about leadership. I'm almost through a doctorate in it for heaven's sake.

If there is a vacuum of communication from the coaching staff to the parents, parents will make up, assume or create their own answers for the questions that are not being answered by someone who knows what the answers actually are. If the ownership and coaches are not OVERLY communicative, open to parents (even though there are dramatic ones in the bunch), and freely accessible, you only feed the drama demon....which makes you want to deal with parents less....which cuts off communication...and stirs the ever swirling toilet bowl of doom.

"In the absence of true leadership people will listen to anyone that steps up to the plate" (give you a cookie if you got that movie reference) but entirely true...and drama mammas live to be the font of all gym knowledge. If the coaching staff isn't specifically communicating the REAL message....the drama mammas will not only take over...they will multiply.

You can do the rest of the math for yourselves.

American President??

Sadly I have used that quote with others pertaining to the cheer world.

 

[12stepCheermom]

American President??

Sadly I have used that quote with others pertaining to the cheer world.

You win!!!!! Macadamia nut? Chocolate chip? Sugar? What kind of cookie would you like!? Such a great movie and actually was the BEST explanation I've ever heard for why flag burning (even though I abhor the thought) should be allowed if we actually want to claim ourselves as "free" Americans.