All-Star Kind Of Being A Coach But Not Really

[Jule]

So I'm not the actual coach of my team but I regularly step in for our coach, when he has to work (1-2 weeks per month).
There are several problems, I'm having at the moment:
I don't want to "play" coach and constantly remind people that they have to work but somehow I often find myself in that position.
It's getting really frustrating. I get instructions from our coach as to what drills and stunts we're to cover during that particular practice and people then question the methods, drills or technique, thinking, they know it better. I agree that there are several ways to approach a certain skill but I stick to what my coach tells me.
It just gets really tiring and I really don't want to stand there and be strict or shout at people. But I feel practices just become kind of unproductive if too many people add their opinions.
Don't get me wrong, I like to use other people's experiences. For example I'll let our experienced flyers help the new ones or get a good backspot to help a new one. I know I'm not all knowing. But it feels really bad to feel constantly in the need to justify my actions.

Another big problem is that people that are not currently active stunting start chilling around, braiding each others hair, chatting on their phones or just lieing around.
There are so many things you can do, even if you're not stunting. Stretching, conditioning or working on tumbling basics. But only a few of them really do that.

I'm just sick and tired of being an animator and making them do something.
I also start feeling guilty. But sometimes we simply just have too many flyers and not enough bases.

I guess, I'm just venting here but if maybe anyone has any insight or tips on how I could handle these situations better... I'd be really greatful.
As a first measure, I put together a sheet of excercises they can do on their own. Hoping that maybe this will give them some clues, what they could do.

But other than that, I'm at a total loss.

My coach tells me to still be friendly and nice and not get angry. But I just cannot understand how some people can be so lazy. My impulse would be to tell them: "Everyone I find chilling at practice will be asked to just go home. But my coach told me, that's not an option.

Should I just let them be? Or step up and be more strict? :confused:

 

[Cheeranswers]

id be more strict. it comes down to them not respecting you as a coach and thats not okay

 

[AllstarObsession]

I step in for a team just like that sometimes. The first day, they did NOT respect me at alllll. So they conditioned the entire practice. The entire three hour practice. I didn't even care, either. I can't imagine not respecting an authority figure, its just straight up rude.

I haven't had a problem since then.

 

[INeverStopCheering]

It can be a hard position to be a team mate and a coach. Talk to your coach about the problems you are having. She should explain to the team what the expectations are when she's not that and that you're the one in charge, just as a parent explains to a child that the babysitter is in charge while the parent is out. The babysitter can dish out punishment (within reason) as she sits fit in the parent's absence, but still follows the parent's instructions. The children are expected to be just as well behaved for the babysitter as they are for the parent

 

[MyGirlCheers]

id be more strict. it comes down to them not respecting you as a coach and thats not okay

This. Your coach has put you in a bad position because he's expecting you to act as a coach without placing you as a coach in the team's eyes. They will never respect you as a coach unless and until he tells them you are in charge.

 

[cheerforeverever]

There needs to be some ground rules set:
-no cell phones/ any other electronics during practice. They can be turned off until practice is over.

- if you are not actively working a stunt, you are working on a rotation (set up a tumbling rotation, conditioning rotation, jumping rotation, then a stretching rotation,etc. with a sheet of a workout to do during a certain time. They do not stop during the rotation until the designated time is up, and if they just lie there/not actually stretch,etc then everyone stops what they are doing and conditions even harder for the rest of practice. When the timer goes off, they switch to the next rotation.)

-perhaps designate a rotation "leader" to keep everyone encouraged to do their rotation and not slack, while you can focus on coaching the stunt group. This person can keep the rotation workers accountable and you don't have to constantly be getting on to them (just glance over here and there to make sure it is going as planned).

 

[Jule]

Thank you SO much for your advice! Every single one is awesome and I''ve been thinking a lot about what you said and still am.
The rotation idea is great! I tried something like that yesterday and made everyone who was not actively stunting drill, spot and practice front walkovers. We're not big with tumbling and we rarely take time to really practice it so this might even make a lot of sense to do.
We don't have any equipment except for some old mats and benches and space is very limited but it kind of worked... still a lot of room for improvement but I didn't get as close to a nervous breakdown as I did monday.
Only a couple of raised eyebrowes here and there and 2 or 3 questions criticizing the way I ran practice. I guess I need to stop wanting to make everyone love me and what I do. After all what I let them do led to really nice basket layouts and halfes (as a drill I made them go to land on their stomach the first times (and all monday). They don't see it but this really does give the flyers the time to get used to the way they move in the air and learn to know where they are at any point. They were also really able to concentrate on their form rather than just piking over for fear of not making it all the way around.
Well, phew. I guess it's kind of nice that I have all next week off and am going for a weeklong vacation. I'll mull it all over and then have a long talk to our coach.

I'm a little more optimistic about this now thanks to you guys! <3

P.S. I guess what's really holding me back is the fear of really and truly accepting the coach position with all the responsability. In the past I used to just let them do what they wanted and have fun with them. But then people were getting frustrated because they felt like they were wasting their time and not being pushed. So that was when I started to be a little more coach and a little less teammate. It is however really not easy for me and I'm very emotional (and passionate) about it.
Yeah, sorry for rambling... :oops:

 

[Jule]

One more question: Would it be okay for me to join the coaches section on here? Who should I contact to ask?

 

[AllstarObsession]

One more question: Would it be okay for me to join the coaches section on here? Who should I contact to ask?

I was wondering this, too, Im just an assistant coach, but I think anything I could learn over there would be great.

 

[Emily]

Cheer - 18+ And Coaches Forum | Fierce Board - The Voice Of Cheer

I hope you can get access to the coaches forum - there is so much wisdom over there!