All-Star We're Not Going To Win Anyway...

[Just-a-Mom]

I have to disagree with that a little. I think with the attitudes teens and pre-teens can get, telling them their not going to win will only make it worse. I think you're right in the part that they won't care as much, but I think at that age that equals not trying at all. When your older if the coaches don't believe in you then its easy for a team to just not even try and become really negative about everything.

Good point. I have a 16-year-old as well, and you're definitely right--this would definitely make her not even try. It just would be accompanied by eye-rolling instead of a sad face.

 

[cheer-1]

As a cheerleader & coach, I know I would never want my coach to deal with a situation like that.. It would give me no positivity to be the best I could on the floor.. and who says my team can't beat another? Sure we can, at the end of the day.. what happens, happens. On the mat, a stunt could so easily go wrong - even if it hits 100% every time at practice! It's so unpredictable, you just have to know you do your best on the floor.. and if that means losing.. it means losing. At the end of the day that's just going to make you more determined to come back even stronger and work harder as a team! A coach should never let off that much negativity, especially to younger girls who don't understand as well, a 6 year old being told she's going to lose before she's given the chance to try? It's the worst way of coaching a team/programme, and it will only separate the team!

 

[alliebby33]

The best thing you can do when a coach says that you're not going to win is to go out there and prove them wrong!

 

[Just-a-Mom]

Winning isn't always about getting 1st. When I cheered in college at Georgia Tech and we placed 4th in D1A college you would SWEAR we had won by how happy we were. That was absolutely the best we could possibly do.. and we were able to do it! It is all about setting realistic goals and shooting for them. Success is achieving the best that you possibly can do. Believe it or not, that is something we say at Rays. While there is a push to 'win' at the end of the day you can never control what the other teams do. We never focus on them (in coaching the kids, we are always aware of what other teams are competing and adjust and plan accordingly). If your kids hit at the end of the day and feel they did their best then be happy with them. Praise their accomplishment. There are more winners than just 1st.

This is so true. Especially with the really little ones. There were times we'd get home and my little one wasn't even sure what place they got--even if it was first! She just loves going to comp. She loves competing, seeing the other teams, the whole thing, whether they win or not.

My older one's senior team leveled up halfway through that season. It was definitely a much harder division for them, but I swear when they got 4th out of 16 at US Finals to look at them you'd have sworn they had just won Worlds. I think the other 3 teams that were still waiting to be called thought they were crazy--you could just read their faces saying "Um...they know they didn't win, right?":D

 

[pinksparklybow]

I typically tell my team... I EXPECT you to place here...(meaning you better get x place out of the teams we are against)...then I tell them our goal. Sometimes the goal of first place is not always reasonable (but they sure know when it is!). I tell them what my expectations are and goals are for them to be considered successful so they can see their improvements from comp to comp. That being said I do EXTENSIVE research on the teams in our divisions so as a coach I am fully aware of where they should place before we even go.

 

[PeaceLoveCEA]

My coach keeps it real, but it's because he doesn't want to get our hopes up and then to get hurt because sometimes, you can never really be sure who is going to win. Before a comp we set a goal, for example: "At XYZ this weekend we are going to hit all of our stunts and tumbling and perform the heck out of the routine! I want to come home with ___ or higher." At every competition we have achieved our goal or higher. :)

 

[marissa.d]

I would never tell that to anybody first of all..
at my old gym the goal was NEVER winning (or it wasn't expressed to us), it was always just do your best, and run your best routine and if you dont win then we, the coaches, haven't done our job!

 

[stuntaholic]

I think that telling a team that they have no chance to win isn't exactly the best way to do it. But I also come from the side that wants to be honest with my kids. So I generally tell them where they stand in the competition and what I expect them to get. But with having realistic expectations athletes can relax. If you think you can't win you relax and go out there with no fear. You can see this with all the conference basketball tournys going on right now. You see a lot of "bad" teams playing close and sometimes beating the good teams. This is because they know they don't have a shot and aren't nervous before playing. I think the same should go for cheer, if you go in with realistic expectations you are less likely to be nervous and may very well exceed your expectations.

 

[newcheerdad]

But with having realistic expectations athletes can relax. If you think you can't win you relax and go out there with no fear. You can see this with all the conference basketball tournys going on right now. You see a lot of "bad" teams playing close and sometimes beating the good teams. This is because they know they don't have a shot and aren't nervous before playing.

I agree with this a little bit, but the big reason all of the conference tournaments are so competitive is because there's parity in college basketball. In a single-elimination scenario where all of the teams aren't that far removed from each other, close games and upsets are bound to happen. This isn't a situation where the talent and skill gulf is really wide.

 

[Hi! It's me!]

This is so true. Especially with the really little ones. There were times we'd get home and my little one wasn't even sure what place they got--even if it was first! She just loves going to comp. She loves competing, seeing the other teams, the whole thing, whether they win or not..

when my youngest was 6 and in her 3rd season, so you would have thought she was a little more clued in, she stood on stage in front of everyone with her team mates going crazy and said those wonderful words, wait did we win? She is at the end of her 5th season and still has that wonderful perspective. She loves what she does and doesn't worry about winning, losing, or competing sick as a dog. She goes out does her best and knows that I am proud of her. I think any coach would be proud of a team that goes out and fights back on day 2 or a team that leaves it all on the mat, because that is what it is all about. So coaches that are Debbie Downers should be strung up by their toes and left to rot somewhere. Encouragement and pride go a lot furthe

 

[PullandPray23]

Ok seriously it's mini!!!!! they should be more concerned about doing well not winning...thats when it should be all about having fun

 

[stuntaholic]

I agree with this a little bit, but the big reason all of the conference tournaments are so competitive is because there's parity in college basketball. In a single-elimination scenario where all of the teams aren't that far removed from each other, close games and upsets are bound to happen. This isn't a situation where the talent and skill gulf is really wide.

I agree and disagree with this comment. Some of the conferences are very close and there isn't a wide talent gulf. On the other hand there are conferences where there is a wide talent gulf and you still see the close tight games because they are playing as if there is nothing to lose. And I think going into a competition with nothing to lose this can be beneficial to a team, if there really is nothing to lose.

 

[Num1Stunta]

Winning isn't always about getting 1st. When I cheered in college at Georgia Tech and we placed 4th in D1A college you would SWEAR we had won by how happy we were. That was absolutely the best we could possibly do.. and we were able to do it! It is all about setting realistic goals and shooting for them. Success is achieving the best that you possibly can do. Believe it or not, that is something we say at Rays. While there is a push to 'win' at the end of the day you can never control what the other teams do. We never focus on them (in coaching the kids, we are always aware of what other teams are competing and adjust and plan accordingly). If your kids hit at the end of the day and feel they did their best then be happy with them. Praise their accomplishment. There are more winners than just 1st.

YES.... Infinite shimmies<3

My biggest thing is coaches who focus on winning, wanting 1st place, etc..... To me, it's never been about that, and all you're doing is setting the kids up to be disappointed.

 

[AScheer]

Good point. I have a 16-year-old as well, and you're definitely right--this would definitely make her not even try. It just would be accompanied by eye-rolling instead of a sad face.

Exactly. Teenagers are so predictable!

 

[Num1Stunta]

Add to that:

My college team went into my freshman year as defending NCA national champs. There was so much pressure put on us to win it again. We were in 1st after day one, and after we competed the EXACT same routine on day 2- everything hit, no mistakes, FLAWLESS, we were sure we had it in the bag. But oops, 3 teams bumped ahead of us because they had more difficulty and they had not hit perfect on day one. We were absolutely devastated. The freshmen felt like it was all our fault that we couldn't keep the streak going. We could not stop crying, and one of the senior captains on the team came up to us literally YELLING in my face to knock it off. "How dare you be disappointed with that?! We just hit our routine perfect both days. Stop crying, you should be damn proud of yourself and all of us." I said "But we were supposed to win! How did this happen? We were in 1st place yesterday, I don't understand..." She was right, and our coaches never echoed those sentiments to us, but I wish they would have.

It was heartbreaking, honestly. All of these expectations were placed on us to win again, win it for the seniors, etc. In reality, we were 4th place out of over 30 teams. How on earth could you be disappointed with that? That was a very important lesson for me, on what is an appropriate amount of pressure to place on your athletes. I never want to see any of my athletes have to deal with that kind of pain EVER.