1st Year Cheer Dad Is This Normal?

[CoachFire]

@Cheer Dad Thats funny Ill Keep that In mind.Last night I had my senior girls not stretching so I bust out with the usual "Am I speaking Chinese" to which a mini bust out in tears just sobbing I ask her why and she tells me "Im only in kinder how am I supposed to speak Chinese and english" I am telling you people go and hug your coaches today you have no Idea what we put up with ESPECIALLY during a competition ! TBH Most coaches will hide from the program director on comp weekends not seek him/her out. Just a Pro Tip

 

[Official OWECheer]

@Cheer Dad Thats funny Ill Keep that In mind.Last night I had my senior girls not stretching so I bust out with the usual "Am I speaking Chinese" to which a mini bust out in tears just sobbing I ask her why and she tells me "Im only in kinder how am I supposed to speak Chinese and english" I am telling you people go and hug your coaches today you have no Idea what we put up with ESPECIALLY during a competition ! TBH Most coaches will hide from the program director on comp weekends not seek him/her out. Just a Pro Tip

LMAO! That is way too cute.

 

[SL&AM]

@Littlebear12 I know you said that you travel for work, schedule a meeting even if it has to be by phone---do not approach the director at a competition!

 

[Littlebear12]

I'm jumping in here late, but trust me, dude, you just need a new gym. This coach sounds like she was probably a typical cheer diva in her day. She was most likely a "point flyer" and thought the world revolved around her. She has not learned the finer art of building a group of individuals into a cohesive unit. She expects kids, and that is what they are, to learn and retain changes to a cheer routine in one practice. She singles out kids who do not adhere to her expectations. She is not a coach, she is a dictator.

Coaches, in all sports, have to have two things leadership skills and a deep understanding of the sport. They believe in things like reciprocal loyalty. My athletes are loyal to me, because they know that I will walk through the fires of hell for them. Even when they are in the wrong, they know that I will remove them from the situation, and then correct them privately. Coaches have the heart of a teacher. These changes in the routine should have been planned out far in advance, with the goal being to steadily increase the level of difficulty throughout the year. A well-choreographed routine will score similarly under any scoring system with only minor adjustments.

Here is my advice:

1) If there are other gyms in your area, start calling them. Explain that you are unhappy with your current situation (no reason to play the blame game, or go into details. You're an unhappy customer, and that is all that should matter to them). Ask if you can come in and watch a practice or two.

2) Find one you like

3) Finish the season where you are, for no other reason, than because it's the right thing to do

4) Based on what you've said already about this joke of a gym where you are currently, don't be surprised if they get wind that you are looking and relieve you of your obligation for the rest of the season. Tell them to go do something anatomically impossible.

5) Gather all the information you need to make an informed decision about which gym will become Gym B.

6) If you have problems at Gym B, consider a long self-examination process and make certain that you are not just expecting too much out of people. All Star cheerleading is very expensive, and the price tag and lead some people to have expectations that are too hi

 

[Littlebear12]

We weren't planning on talking to them the day of the competition. Rather a day or two after.
At practice today the girls were told there were 3-5 who would be kicked off the team after this competition. So we may not need to worry about ANY talking. :)

 

[123jump4!]

We weren't planning on talking to them the day of the competition. Rather a day or two after.
At practice today the girls were told there were 3-5 who would be kicked off the team after this competition. So we may not need to worry about ANY talking. :)

OMG... this gym sounds miserable. I hate stuff like that! Find another gym and I hope you're not put off cheer completely!

 

[cupieqt]

@Cheer Dad exactly now imagine doing that every day with parents going nuts on your every move it gets old fast not justifying this coaches obvious issues just giving some insight.. I actually had a level 3 mom question why we had to do extended stunts yesterday >.<

You're gonna need to learn to smile and explain with sincere patience. They'll never stop asking and most parents just genuinely want to know and aren't being "stupid" on purpose. They don't know what you know. If you don't want them to ask you questions about the sport you're teaching their kid then you'll probably need to make that a clear policy and explain it up front.

Or just laugh and give them @Cheer Dad 's awesome answers. He's got a gift for the dad jokes.


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[Littlebear12]

In hind sight I think we would have been better off starting in level 1. In our team about a 1/3 of the girls are new to cheer. The 1 hour long brief on what to expect and what competition cheer is about is just not enough to prepare parent and CP for a year long commitment. A year in a child's life is a long time! I sill do not have a schedule for all the competitions. I do not understand how CP parents so easily adjust to short notice competitions schedule and location changes. We plan our calendar out months in the future. I got the location and hair requirements for today's competition yesterday a practice.

 

[CheerBank]

In hind sight I think we would have been better off starting in level 1. In our team about a 1/3 of the girls are new to cheer. The 1 hour long brief on what to expect and what competition cheer is about is just not enough to prepare parent and CP for a year long commitment. A year in a child's life is a long time! I sill do not have a schedule for all the competitions. I do not understand how CP parents so easily adjust to short notice competitions schedule and location changes. We plan our calendar out months in the future. I got the location and hair requirements for today's competition yesterday a practice.

It sounds like your gym just has terrible communication with its athletes.

By "schedule for all the competitions" you mean what time your cp actually competes, no one has that until the week of the competition and sometimes not even until the Wednesday/Thursday before, as crazy as it sounds. If you mean you do not have solid dates for all the competitions the gym is attending (even tentative ones) then that is all on your gym owners doing their job poorly.

Hair requirements can and do sometimes change from competition to competition or even from Day 1 to Day 2, btw.

 

[cheer25mom]

In hind sight I think we would have been better off starting in level 1. In our team about a 1/3 of the girls are new to cheer. The 1 hour long brief on what to expect and what competition cheer is about is just not enough to prepare parent and CP for a year long commitment. A year in a child's life is a long time! I sill do not have a schedule for all the competitions. I do not understand how CP parents so easily adjust to short notice competitions schedule and location changes. We plan our calendar out months in the future. I got the location and hair requirements for today's competition yesterday a practice.

It's common not to have a performance order and meet time until a few days before because that's when event producers make that info available to the gym. Hair requirements I can see changing, but if you mean you don't know what competitions the gym is attending, that is unacceptable IMO. We had that list before tryouts and were able to make an informed decision about wether or not to commit to the program. Some gyms don't do that, but almost all of them have it by end of summer.


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[Littlebear12]

It sounds like your gym just has terrible communication with its athletes.

By "schedule for all the competitions" you mean what time your cp actually competes, no one has that until the week of the competition and sometimes not even until the Wednesday/Thursday before, as crazy as it sounds. If you mean you do not have solid dates for all the competitions the gym is attending (even tentative ones) then that is all on your gym owners doing their job poorly.

Hair requirements can and do sometimes change from competition to competition or even from Day 1 to Day 2, btw.

I don't know the solid dates for the competitions. Last Sunday was an added comp apparently the EP was short teams so we went to fill out the show as it were. Are team took 1st y2, 1st overall level 2, and 1st over all levels for points. My CP finally has a jacket :-). One of the mom heard we were in this smaller comp to give the girls and the parents a win. I am fine with it. The girls coach let the girl know not to let this win go to their heads, She told them if this was a big comp they would not have won. We had dinner with one of the teams CP mom who has been in cheer for the past 3 seasons. She had a lot to say about the poor performance of the gym as a hole. I was wrong we are a small gym. Strangely the San Antonio comp had us competing as a large gym.

One final question.
We have 2 competitions left, the big one in Chicago April 9-10th and a local one March 26th. The last minute change from Orlando to Chicago created a conflict with my CP Daddy Daughter Dance and my CP decided she wants to go to the dance. This is her last Daddy Daughter dance and she has been planning it for awhile. She wants to wear the dress we had custom made for the event. So here is my question. Should we go to the March 26 comp or offer to remove my CP from the team now so they can rework the routine and have time to preform it March 26 in preparation for April 9th. My CP handed me her cheer costume last night to clean with the desire to give it back on Tuesday at practice. I am willing to stay though March and go to the March 26 comp. I would like to do what is best for the team and my CP has said the same.

I would like to thank all the kind people on this board for thier help.
We will be looking at other gyms soon and will not be competing next season. Taking a year off to spend time on our 2 sons activities (spread the love and wealth as it were). Our plans are now to focus on elite tumbling, and stunting with an eye toward sideline cheer in middle school.

You have been wonderful.

Thanks again.

Confused Cheer Dad

 

[123jump4!]

I don't know the solid dates for the competitions. Last Sunday was an added comp apparently the EP was short teams so we went to fill out the show as it were. Are team took 1st y2, 1st overall level 2, and 1st over all levels for points. My CP finally has a jacket :). One of the mom heard we were in this smaller comp to give the girls and the parents a win. I am fine with it. The girls coach let the girl know not to let this win go to their heads, She told them if this was a big comp they would not have won. We had dinner with one of the teams CP mom who has been in cheer for the past 3 seasons. She had a lot to say about the poor performance of the gym as a hole. I was wrong we are a small gym. Strangely the San Antonio comp had us competing as a large gym.

One final question.
We have 2 competitions left, the big one in Chicago April 9-10th and a local one March 26th. The last minute change from Orlando to Chicago created a conflict with my CP Daddy Daughter Dance and my CP decided she wants to go to the dance. This is her last Daddy Daughter dance and she has been planning it for awhile. She wants to wear the dress we had custom made for the event. So here is my question. Should we go to the March 26 comp or offer to remove my CP from the team now so they can rework the routine and have time to preform it March 26 in preparation for April 9th. My CP handed me her cheer costume last night to clean with the desire to give it back on Tuesday at practice. I am willing to stay though March and go to the March 26 comp. I would like to do what is best for the team and my CP has said the same.

I would like to thank all the kind people on this board for thier help.
We will be looking at other gyms soon and will not be competing next season. Taking a year off to spend time on our 2 sons activities (spread the love and wealth as it were). Our plans are now to focus on elite tumbling, and stunting with an eye toward sideline cheer in middle school.

You have been wonderful.

Thanks again.

Confused Cheer Dad

If it was me I would quit now if that's what she wants to do. It would probably be good for the team to rework the routine sooner rather than later as you say. Didn't you pay for the uniform though?

Congrats on the win! :)

 

[Rahcheermom!]

Her one man coach has her doing revers ups and aerial ups, he told me they where level 6 stunts. last month she was working on the superman reverse up. She got the aerial up in 1 hour with him just expanding it to her. Sadly her one man coach went back college so she hasn't practiced in 3 weeks.

My 9 year old has been working on similar stunts! This is her 5th season and she loves it. We struggled in the first couple of years because of crazy early comp times and routine changes etc., but as they move up in levels the times can get better, but you stay later, but aside from all of the craziness I have watched my child grow into this incredible athlete, with a strong work ethic and the true meaning of team work, she is passionate about this sport and therefore I'm passionate. We have to look for the positives because everything has pros and cons. Weigh them out and then decide!

 

[Cheer Dad]

@Littlebear12 I would discuss the final 2 competitions with the coaches. They may want cp for the local one she can attend. If they don't then it's their loss and you have time to research other gyms you may be interested in.


** I don't always cite facts but when I do I make them up**

 

[MomMomMamaMom]

One final question.
We have 2 competitions left, the big one in Chicago April 9-10th and a local one March 26th. The last minute change from Orlando to Chicago created a conflict with my CP Daddy Daughter Dance and my CP decided she wants to go to the dance. This is her last Daddy Daughter dance and she has been planning it for awhile. She wants to wear the dress we had custom made for the event. So here is my question. Should we go to the March 26 comp or offer to remove my CP from the team now so they can rework the routine and have time to preform it March 26 in preparation for April 9th. My CP handed me her cheer costume last night to clean with the desire to give it back on Tuesday at practice. I am willing to stay though March and go to the March 26 comp. I would like to do what is best for the team and my CP has said the same.

I would like to thank all the kind people on this board for thier help.
We will be looking at other gyms soon and will not be competing next season. Taking a year off to spend time on our 2 sons activities (spread the love and wealth as it were). Our plans are now to focus on elite tumbling, and stunting with an eye toward sideline cheer in middle school.

You have been wonderful.

Thanks again.

Confused Cheer Dad

I would talk to the coach about the final competition. Technically it's the gym's call not yours, as most gyms gave some sort of clause about what happens if an athlete misses a competition. Not sure how your fee schedule has been set up, but there is the possibility that you have already paid for these competitions, which I would want addressed if it were me.

I am sorry that your CP was made to feel badly about not being able to accommodate a change in schedule. That feels wrong to me. However, it a good opportunity for your family to have a good conversation about what your priorities are, which is always valuable. I, personally, would support my daughters in either decision and then help them to navigate the consequences of whatever decision they made. I would also want to know from the coach/owner what they felt was best for the team at this point, and would want some reassurances that if CP did attend the last comp she would be welcome.