- Mar 23, 2024
- 1
- 0
hi, i used to cheer for 3 years at my small k-8 private school, and i really liked it. it was small budget and a small team, no-tryout. when i switched to public for middle school, i wasn't that interested in cheer.
i quickly found out how complicated tryouts were, and i bailed on trying out for my 8th grade year. i also felt very out of place. the out of place feeling contributes a lot to my feeling of not being cut out for cheer.
just so everyone knows, i am very very different from most of the cheerleaders. i do not have any cheerleader friends. i'm a lesbian, and gay people tend to form groups with other gay people. which means band kids, guard girls, generally not cheerleaders. i'm also probably autistic, but we'll get to that.
when i was going to be an incoming freshman, i locked in. i finally tried out, and took it very seriously. i am not athletic. my jumps are mediocre, and i'm barely a level 1 tumbler. nobody in my family is athletic, so my parents had no experience with this. (i'm an only child). i heard they had spots for everyone on the freshman team, so i was excited. i was the only one who got cut.
i was devastated. shortly after this, i developed a special interest for cheer that has lasted my freshman year. i did my midterm presentation on the importance of cheer. i became obsessed with allstar. i started practicing tumbling (i haven't improved yet).
i would go to pep rallies and sendoffs and games just to watch the cheerleaders. i would daydream about cheerleading. i started practicing early. today was tryout for my sophomore year, and i got cut. again. i'm just miserable. i don't know how to handle another year in the stands.
i know this is irrational, but i sometimes think they cut me becuase i'm gay and weird and different and not the typical cheer archetype. i have no friends on the team and some of them think i'm a freak. i just want them to see past that. i love cheer more than half of the girls on the team, and it makes me angry sometimes.
my mom is saying that i might just not be cut out for sports. i'm still going to try next year, but i don't know. i just want to do it so bad.
i quickly found out how complicated tryouts were, and i bailed on trying out for my 8th grade year. i also felt very out of place. the out of place feeling contributes a lot to my feeling of not being cut out for cheer.
just so everyone knows, i am very very different from most of the cheerleaders. i do not have any cheerleader friends. i'm a lesbian, and gay people tend to form groups with other gay people. which means band kids, guard girls, generally not cheerleaders. i'm also probably autistic, but we'll get to that.
when i was going to be an incoming freshman, i locked in. i finally tried out, and took it very seriously. i am not athletic. my jumps are mediocre, and i'm barely a level 1 tumbler. nobody in my family is athletic, so my parents had no experience with this. (i'm an only child). i heard they had spots for everyone on the freshman team, so i was excited. i was the only one who got cut.
i was devastated. shortly after this, i developed a special interest for cheer that has lasted my freshman year. i did my midterm presentation on the importance of cheer. i became obsessed with allstar. i started practicing tumbling (i haven't improved yet).
i would go to pep rallies and sendoffs and games just to watch the cheerleaders. i would daydream about cheerleading. i started practicing early. today was tryout for my sophomore year, and i got cut. again. i'm just miserable. i don't know how to handle another year in the stands.
i know this is irrational, but i sometimes think they cut me becuase i'm gay and weird and different and not the typical cheer archetype. i have no friends on the team and some of them think i'm a freak. i just want them to see past that. i love cheer more than half of the girls on the team, and it makes me angry sometimes.
my mom is saying that i might just not be cut out for sports. i'm still going to try next year, but i don't know. i just want to do it so bad.