All-Star Closed Practices - Advise From Other Parents Needed.

[UEAcheerchick]

I think the main thing to stress is open and honest communication between you and your daughter. Trust her that she'll let you know what's going on and if she gives you something to worry about then you can follow up on it. If not and she says things are just fine and if the other parents haven't complained about anything,then there's No reason to put extra stress on yourself :)

 

[prettycheermom]

Well at my gym we have both, open and close. We have a viewing area but around the end of August the shade in the viewing area goes down until comp season starts which is late October for us. And we see a difference and it's so worth it. Plus if your CP is anything like mine who is only 9 by the way she gives me play by play of what goes on in practice. I know it's a tense situation right now but it gets better. Plus you don't have to deal with all the Susie's moms and that's always a positive!!!!

 

[Mamarazzi]

Just curious why you would decide on a gym that has this policy? Did you not know that practices were closed? And since you did decide that this gym was the best fit for your cp, has something happened to make you question your trust in the staff?

 

[CheerBank]

The parent room in our new gym is pretty small. It has 2 large windows but can get pretty crowded in there and it always seems like the same group has the best viewing seats (I cannot get there more than 10 minutes before practice nor do I really want to.) Although I like watching, I have a feeling I will be spending a lot of time reading in my car this summer (how many times can I go to Costco?) They did close off the parent room for tryouts, which I know made a lot of moms a little crazy, but they camped out with beach chairs in the parking lot instead.

 

[Angelica]

It may be hard at first but you will get used to it. If anything happens the gym will call you, so don't stress too much! Go shopping and stay busy while she's practicing (:

 

[lovecheering]

Having closed practices will make it alot less intense for you. Our practices are open, but they do close them around choreography time and a few weeks before the first comp. I have carpool drivers, so I am never there for an entire practice. Just dropping or picking up. So, I have yet to see a practice in full, and it actually makes it better for me as the parent. Because .... when a parent is there, the entire time you're wondering so many things .... why is my kid in back, why is that kid flying, why isn't my kid doing running tumbling, they look like their struggling, that kid shouldn't be on that team, listening to other parents complain, complain, complain, etc...... (you get the idea). When you are not there, you have no idea what is happening, but you have to put your faith and trust in the coaches, that by comp time, everything will be perfection. I had a mother tell me one time that her most memorable moment was the 1st time she saw her daughters routine was at their 1st comp, and she bawled like a baby, because she couldn't believe how great they looked. If you trust your gym and their coaches, everything will be just fine. And less stressful for you!

 

[cheeeeer93]

As someone who coaches the mini age group, I cannot stress that you should just have trust in the coaches. When parents are in practice, it really does change the atmosphere. The kids are constantly looking to their parents approval and are just overall unfocused. If you are there, it is just making the coach's job harder. I'm sure your daughter will let you know if there is something that really does go wrong.
If you want to be at the gym during the first couple practices, maybe you could set up a post-practice activity for the kids with some other parents. Go outside and set up some crafts as a surprise. (Don't tell the kids, it just makes them more unfocused! haha!) That way, you're still at the gym but you don't appear like a hover-mom who doesn't have faith in the coaches. And the kids have something to do after practice!

 

[cheerkidzmom]

My CP is older so this is not an issue with us at all. However, I am surprised at the amount of people who say "just trust them".
Why does this surprise me? Every parenting magazine and book says that you should choose a pre school/day care/kindergarten that does not mind that a parent drops in unexpectedly. To actually be suspicious of any school that does not allow this. The Y which used to strongly promote having parents leave during classes has changed their stance and actively encourages parents to stay. Schools say parents should volunteer in the classroom to better understand their child, their lessons and the school in general.
In my opinion, parents need an area that they can see into the gym. They don't need to talk or be seen by the child, but they need to be able to see. If this is not allowed or encouraged for every practice, then you should be able to drop by unexpectedly ( beginning, middle or end) and see for yourself what is going on.
Relying on very young children (8 and under) to tell you what is going on....is not a reliable system.

 

[0riginal]

Honestly, if you leave your daughter at school all day you can leave them at practice. I feel like you are being to overprotective. Use that time for you self to go out and do something.

Exactly what I was thinking!
There are always going to be people at the gym I feel like, just running around. I wouldn't worry.

 

[MomMomMamaMom]

I am, in many ways, an overprotective parent. And I totally get where you are coming from. It's a tough thing to have to trust without trust being earned, so I think it's okay to express that and let the coach know that you have some concerns. You probably aren't the first parent, and the coach or gym owner probably has something to offer by way of a solution. I wouldn't expect them to change the rules for you, but they may be able to point out some other parents who had similar concerns, or arrange for an introduction or something like that.

On another note, our gym has an open practice and while I love it, I sometimes think it's horrible. It can be very distracting, and it gets under my skin when other parents think they can coach their child while they are basing or backspotting MY child. I would much prefer the coaches do it, and that the parent wasn't distracting the stunt group, so I feel safer when those parents aren't there. Also as someone who only stays for practice periodically I have noticed that there are quite a few kids who do quite a bit better at practice without their parents there. Not because the parents do anything at all, but because the kids are more focused on the coaches.

 

[cheer4evah]

Just curious why you would decide on a gym that has this policy? Did you not know that practices were closed? And since you did decide that this gym was the best fit for your cp, has something happened to make you question your trust in the staff?

We moved from NJ to AL last August. Our gym in NJ had an open practice policy, with a parent viewing area upstairs with a two way mirror type viewing system. When we moved to AL, my daughter started cheering for ACE Eastern Shore which also had an open practice policy with a viewing area. However, this viewing area had clear glass and I did notice my daughter looking over to me sometimes. There were a few times I had to point her to look away from me, so from a coaching stand point (especially with this age group) I completely understand and agree with the policy. Unfortunately, ACE closed their Eastern Shore location this year and moved to Pensacola which is about a 45 minute drive for us. At this point in my CP's cheer "career" and with the other work and family obligations I have, that drive is not something we can do this season. I chose this gym based on location, the teams they have that will fit my CP's age and skill level, the knowledge and experience of the coaching staff, and overall reputation. I guess my main issue is just that other then talking with the owner and word of mouth (from people I really don't know too well since I have only lived here since August) I don't have any personal knowledge or interaction with the coaches yet. Yes, I did know that this was their policy. I don't feel like it is a "deal breaker", I just wanted to see how other parents with younger children dealt with this. As cheerkidzmom mentioned, you hear more and more these days about places having open policies and it is stressed so much not to leave your children alone with adults you don't know that it is hard to not be overprotective.

Thank you to everyone who responded. I'm sure I will feel more and more comfortable as time goes on and as my CP attends practices and comes home and tells me about them.