Looking For Advice For My Daughter

[cupieqt]

I've been dealing with mental blocks for years as a coach. I used to worry and push and plead and yell. Then I realized they were contagious and the more attention I gave them the more I had to deal with.
I stopped making it a big deal. Now, I tell any athlete struggling to perform a skill they're truly blocking on that it's natural for that to happen sometimes, that they will overcome it in their own time, and not to let frustration overcome them. I speak to their parents privately and tell them not to put any extra pressure on their child and to just be supportive and encouraging. It's very hard for the athlete, parent and coaches to not be angry about it but it really does help to just let it be. There's really nothing outside influences can do to break it.
The more relaxed they feel the better. I've had way more breakthroughs with this method than any other I've tried.

 

[Cheerbubble]

I've been dealing with mental blocks for years as a coach. I used to worry and push and plead and yell. Then I realized they were contagious and the more attention I gave them the more I had to deal with.
I stopped making it a big deal. Now, I tell any athlete struggling to perform a skill they're truly blocking on that it's natural for that to happen sometimes, that they will overcome it in their own time, and not to let frustration overcome them. I speak to their parents privately and tell them not to put any extra pressure on their child and to just be supportive and encouraging. It's very hard for the athlete, parent and coaches to not be angry about it but it really does help to just let it be. There's really nothing outside influences can do to break it.
The more relaxed they feel the better. I've had way more breakthroughs with this method than any other I've tried.

That is great advice but what do you do about tryouts when they Are not throwing the skill they need to be on a level 2 or higher? At tryout time she seems to put more pressure on herself then she gets worse at Least that's what she did last tryouts. She was throwing her bhs then stopped a week before tryouts. There answer was to put her in the rec team she was crushed but was like okay I will do it so I am in the gym then they cancelled the rec team so she was like okay I will just condition and due privates. I just hope that they see her passion and determination

 

[cupieqt]

There's really nothing you can do but continue with training. If there is no rec team or level 1 team that she can cheer for, she will have to accept just training until she can make a higher level team with the skills necessary for those levels.

 

[Cheerbubble]

There's really nothing you can do but continue with training. If there is no rec team or level 1 team that she can cheer for, she will have to accept just training until she can make a higher level team with the skills necessary for those

If only I had a magic wand lol Thanks for the advice!!

 

[OneIntenseMama]

kanders I tried to push when CP had a block years ago until she finally told me. . ."you pushing me is not going to make me want to do this, it will only make me hate going to the gym. I have to do this myself"

That was the last time I pushed her at doing any skill.

What yuo can do is encourage her and let her know you believe she can do it, she just has to beleieve in herself again. It understandable to have doubts after injury and tell her that you'll support her so that whenever she is ready you will be there to watch her finally hit it again.

Finally the reality check. . .let her know that while this is entirely her decision and you will support her no matter what, at some point she may not make a team if this block continues past tryouts.

I think if you don't say another word about it it may take some of the pressure off and let her gain that confidence back.

final suggestion: www.fortheloveoftumbling.com is a great website with lots of awesome tools to get past blocks. Debbie Love is a personable and exceptional coach and often times responds directly to e-mails from kids having troubles. Her two kids are very positive motivators as well.

good luck!

I so totally agree with SharkDad. Debbie Love has helped my CP so much (and just through her website) She is an amazing person who is there for any kid who needs help. Keep her talking and you should see improvement. Good luck to the both of you

 

[cupieqt]

If only I had a magic wand lol Thanks for the advice!!

Me too. I'd be the richest coach in the world ;)

I know how maddening and frustrating it can be. Hang in there. And definitely check out what Debbie Love has on her site. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

 

[initfortheglitter]

They do suck!! I told the psyc if he gets her over this I will tell anybody and everybody to go see him if they are blocking lol!! I agree with not making a rash decision I always tell her to sleep on it and decide and she always comes back with I'm not giving up I will get over this!

I was really stressed earlier this year about my full and when it began to affect my other skills, I took a break... When I came back, the skills just came so much more naturally :)

 

[CFAmom2]

My CP has had probably about 5 tumbling blocks so far and I have tried everything from yelling to bribery to ignoring it. The only thing that works is when she decides she has had enough. No one has been able to do it for her, she has had to learn how to push past the fear. All you can do is be supportive and let her go at her own pace. Hard I know, but you have to. Most importantly, don't get frustrated, it makes it worse. P.S. each time my daughter has come back better than before. She now throws doubles. Good luck

 

[cupieqt]

I was really stressed earlier this year about my full and when it began to affect my other skills, I took a break... When I came back, the skills just came so much more naturally :)

When the kids complain about holiday breaks, I always tell them "This break is good for you. It's not too long for you to forget anything, but just long enough to rest your body and your brain. You will be stronger when you return.". And it's true every year.
I don't recommend long breaks because it will make you rusty but a week or two is usually the BEST medicine!

 

[Cheerbubble]

I so totally agree with SharkDad. Debbie Love has helped my CP so much (and just through her website) She is an amazing person who is there for any kid who needs help. Keep her talking and you should see improvement. Good luck to the both of you

Thank you!!

 

[Cheerbubble]

Thank you all for the great advice! I will let y'all know how it goes! I am going to take all this advice and pass it on to her. Thanks again!

 

[Karlssssss]

Tell her that no matte what she should never give up! However, if she really wants to cheer at this gym she should go to tryouts and personally tell the coaches she wants a shot at a level 2 or 3 team. They are likely to have more respect for her if she tells them herself rather than getting you to do it for her. But remind her not to get her hopes up or get discouraged if she isn't placed on a team. She has to remember that a certain number of people on the team must throw their tumbling in order for them to get maximum points. If she doesn't make one you can always start looking into gyms with stronger level 1 teams. Good luck to you and your daughter!

 

[Tosh]

I have found that the best thing for a mental block is competition and challenge by a team mate. If these are skills that she has but just will not do.....have her take a break, but still associate with her team mates.....visit a practice especially with a lower level team. As a coach I would encourage the girls and start group conversations with the person that has the block present and discuss what skills they are working on and what levels they are aiming for for the next season......I promise you she will feel terrible and as most of these grils are competitive, she will not want a lower level team mate pass her by and she will do it on her own....I have tried this on several occasions and it worked....Take to the coach and ask for some assistance........good luck

 

[Kelsey Baron]

I was going through the same thing, she nay get over it at any time. You seem pretty lenient about it, so she should be staying a bit more calm as well, which is the best thing. I did not go to any specialists, or anything, i just started working on different skills, so i would stop stressing on one and getting frustrated. I wish her the best of luck!

 

[Goosepatrick]

Make sure your cp wants this as bad as you do. If she hasn't cheered in two years and not breaking through, maybe it's not the sport for her any longer. Maybe explore dance or other activities that match her strengths. I work with people on discovering their strengths and matching professions to their strengths. People are more successful and have higher self esteem when they are good at what they do. Constantly being reminded you have a weakness defeats some and lowers self esteem. Just another way to look at it. There is more out there besides cheer. If she loves it beyond belief, maybe look into high school cheer. A lot of schools don't require tumbling and may be the excitement she needs.

Good luck