High School Seniors With No Work Ethic

[CheerItFullOut]

One asked to be benched. I wish I could just remove... before I do that, I need to clear w/ AD and explain b/c she is a head case, to the point she is saying she doesn't want to cheer, but her family has no idea, they are constantly telling me how excited she is, so for me to not be perceived as the bad guy, I need to clear first to show that I am doing the right thing. UGH

Have you tried having a parent meeting with her face to face? Ask her IN FRONT of mom and Dad why she would "want to be benched" if she's so "excited to cheer"? SHE will be forced to answer for her behavior in front of YOU and them...rather than go home and manipulate the situation (as some often do) ALSO...I can't stress how important documentation is...(signed by the individual getting punished acknowledging they understand the reason they are getting a reprimand.... It covers your buns when the cheerleader comes back and is saying "what?! I don't remember that?! I don't understand... I'm just out there giving my best"... Really, b/c you signed and acknowledged that you weren't giving 100% on multiple occasions....?! Last, not sure what "benching" is for your squad....sometimes it's considered an easy "day off with great seats to the game"... I make sure NO cell phone, no talking to "friends".... No snacks with the exception of meal break... And no crowd interaction until game is over...if any are violated another benching will follow. Ugh, I really hope everything works out for you... This type of thing can cast a shadow on a really great season. Best of luck... I know every squad is different :/

 

[SparkleSpankies]

Have you tried having a parent meeting with her face to face? Ask her IN FRONT of mom and Dad why she would "want to be benched" if she's so "excited to cheer"? SHE will be forced to answer for her behavior in front of YOU and them...rather than go home and manipulate the situation (as some often do) ALSO...I can't stress how important documentation is...(signed by the individual getting punished acknowledging they understand the reason they are getting a reprimand.... It covers your buns when the cheerleader comes back and is saying "what?! I don't remember that?! I don't understand... I'm just out there giving my best"... Really, b/c you signed and acknowledged that you weren't giving 100% on multiple occasions....?! Last, not sure what "benching" is for your squad....sometimes it's considered an easy "day off with great seats to the game"... I make sure NO cell phone, no talking to "friends".... No snacks with the exception of meal break... And no crowd interaction until game is over...if any are violated another benching will follow. Ugh, I really hope everything works out for you... This type of thing can cast a shadow on a really great season. Best of luck... I know every squad is different :/

Already tried with parents/face to face... she is seriously a huge issue and I think she refuses to tell her parents she doesn't want to cheer... this is the kid that didn't want to cheer going into junior year and changed her mind and I spoke to her parents then and I said 100% or nothing, I am not forcing her to do this. They have come back at me a few times (although the AD wants less parent involvement, so everything is run through him) and I have explained to them her and why with certain things.. I am just unfortunately making a huge decision for her and with that, she will have to explain to her parents - since I will be notifying the AD and have backup. Her decision this late in the game is also affecting the squad and we are officially competing 12 not 16...

Benching, dressed in full uniform, sit w/ coaches and pretty much follow us around like a lost child. :-) It's pretty pathetic.

 

[omgitssydthekid]

Have you tried having a parent meeting with her face to face? Ask her IN FRONT of mom and Dad why she would "want to be benched" if she's so "excited to cheer"? SHE will be forced to answer for her behavior in front of YOU and them...rather than go home and manipulate the situation (as some often do) ALSO...I can't stress how important documentation is...(signed by the individual getting punished acknowledging they understand the reason they are getting a reprimand.... It covers your buns when the cheerleader comes back and is saying "what?! I don't remember that?! I don't understand... I'm just out there giving my best"... Really, b/c you signed and acknowledged that you weren't giving 100% on multiple occasions....?! Last, not sure what "benching" is for your squad....sometimes it's considered an easy "day off with great seats to the game"... I make sure NO cell phone, no talking to "friends".... No snacks with the exception of meal break... And no crowd interaction until game is over...if any are violated another benching will follow. Ugh, I really hope everything works out for you... This type of thing can cast a shadow on a really great season. Best of luck... I know every squad is different :/

When we had girls benched when I was in high school, we had to stand the entire game at the front of the track in front of the fence. There was no talking and you had to wear your uniform so everyone knew you were benched.


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[SparkleSpankies]

I have the SAME problem this year! I'm so sorry you're going through this. I had to "hit them where it hurts"
It breaks my heart that some seniors feel that it's the year to just slack off and act out when it can be a true opportunity to be a leader and leave a mark of excellence among their peers. There comes a time where I think every coach has to have that "senior" talk with their squad about what impression do they want to leave behind? How do they want their legacy to be perceived? Do they want their team to remember them as the ones that "didn't care"... Didn't motivate or move others? It's essential in a program to stress that individuals understand that seniors are valuable in that they have knowledge and experience that can help to enhance tradition and expand cheer education avenues. (Some of my best veterans have gone on to become great coaches) however... If a senior shows inconsideration, lack of work ethic, and or an inability to put their ego of seniority aside from their "team" mentality...they leave nothing behind and take nothing with them but wasted: time, money and efforts. Nobody forces anyone to try out for cheerleading it's strictly voluntary...it's good to remind seniors who act as though they are being "forced" to do something they don't want to do.... That they can leave at any time (by their own accord or through the appropriate avenues as outlined in the contract they signed when they CHOSE to participate)

Oh I also wanted to say, THANK GOD I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE. I have never experienced anything like it, other coaches can't believe the crap and the emotional stress these girls have over silly stuff.. I just feel like if you stick it through, you have to want to work.. Such wastes of talent!!!!

 

[CheerItFullOut]

Oh I also wanted to say, THANK GOD I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE. I have never experienced anything like it, other coaches can't believe the crap and the emotional stress these girls have over silly stuff.. I just feel like if you stick it through, you have to want to work.. Such wastes of talent!!!!

Oh yea... Sometimes you'll have amazing seniors who are excellent leaders and other years you'll be questioning if maturity really DOES come with age... There was another school in our area that had a senior situation so bad with cheer that nearly all got removed mid season...and it was a large class. In cheer, you're never alone, if it's happening, it's probably happened before and know that as long as your main mission is to grow better people along with better athletes you'll get support from all the right places. Also, while these kids may not realize it now, they may likely look back and see that you were truly trying to be a positive moving force in their athletic life. One never enjoys punishing/ cutting anyone... But sometimes it's necessary for the bigger picture, and a bigger lesson.

 

[Official OWECheer]

Oh I also wanted to say, THANK GOD I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE. I have never experienced anything like it, other coaches can't believe the crap and the emotional stress these girls have over silly stuff.. I just feel like if you stick it through, you have to want to work.. Such wastes of talent!!!!

"OMG! Britney's talking to the guy I broke up with three years ago! Arrrrgghhh my life is over. Time to make my team suffer for something that they had nothing to do with!"

@CheerItFullOut could you elaborate on the other school's situation, if you don't mind?

 

[SparkleSpankies]

"OMG! Britney's talking to the guy I broke up with three years ago! Arrrrgghhh my life is over. Time to make my team suffer for something that they had nothing to do with!"

@CheerItFullOut could you elaborate on the other school's situation, if you don't mind?

I wish.. It's I hate being in high school and listening to my parents b/c I am in high school so now I am using my coach as a scapegoat! LOL So it all becomes my fault somehow.. she is NUTS

 

[catlady]

DH and I had a Sr. last year and I'll take this from a different perspective. These kids have had the same routine for the past 13 years with school. Get up, go to school, talk with friends, do homework, do activity, go to bed, repeat. Fast forward to Jr. and Sr. year....What do you want to do for the rest of your life? Where do you want to go to school? Those scores aren't going to cut it. Are you applying? Where? That's too expensive. Did you apply for scholarships? How many? How do you expect to pay for that? Where are you going to live? You're an adult now..... On top of that, parents often feel as though they haven't prepared them well enough and start giving crash courses in life skills.

With Sr's, my best advice is talk and listen. If they are shutting down, more than likely life is feeling intense. If they are partying all the time, they are probably feeling like they will never have fun again. If they are giving up, they may be lacking hope. Remind these girls cheer is what is familiar, can be the soft place to land and be a great outlet when things are stressful. Even though they're entitled, they may have some pretty intense expectations looming over their heads. Making plans to leave everything you love and all that is familiar behind is pretty overwhelming.

I all of the sudden have the urge to watch St. Elmo's Fire:D

 

[SparkleSpankies]

DH and I had a Sr. last year and I'll take this from a different perspective. These kids have had the same routine for the past 13 years with school. Get up, go to school, talk with friends, do homework, do activity, go to bed, repeat. Fast forward to Jr. and Sr. year....What do you want to do for the rest of your life? Where do you want to go to school? Those scores aren't going to cut it. Are you applying? Where? That's too expensive. Did you apply for scholarships? How many? How do you expect to pay for that? Where are you going to live? You're an adult now..... On top of that, parents often feel as though they haven't prepared them well enough and start giving crash courses in life skills.

With Sr's, my best advice is talk and listen. If they are shutting down, more than likely life is feeling intense. If they are partying all the time, they are probably feeling like they will never have fun again. If they are giving up, they may be lacking hope. Remind these girls cheer is what is familiar, can be the soft place to land and be a great outlet when things are stressful. Even though they're entitled, they may have some pretty intense expectations looming over their heads. Making plans to leave everything you love and all that is familiar behind is pretty overwhelming.

I all of the sudden have the urge to watch St. Elmo's Fire:D

I love it.. I think the same way and I always encourage them to make new memories and also use this as a good and happy place..

 

[SparkleSpankies]

Update.. 1 is working.. the other on Monday I am going to have a chat.. b/c the WHOLE team even her friend see it.. :-)

 

[Official OWECheer]

Update.. 1 is working.. the other on Monday I am going to have a chat.. b/c the WHOLE team even her friend see it.. :-)

Let us know how it goes.

 

[EWalsh1029]

My suggestion is to hit them where it hurts.

My girls love stunting and showing off and having the attention on them at rallies and games. They also love competing (even when they are lazy at practice.)

When they are lazy at practice, I have pulled them from games, Homecoming rallies, you name it. Even from important comps.

If you want to half do things, cheat conditioning, etc. you can sit by me and do nothing.

That usually clears up the lazy problem.

Im sitting my first group of girls at tonights game (about 5) who did not act appropriately at our fundraising event this weekend (showing up over an hour late, leaving early without my permission, and swearing)... I have some of 'those' parents and I'm nervous beyond words about how the parents will act, not the athletes :confused:

 

[CheerItFullOut]

Well...it's really their coaches story to tell.. Let's just say I felt bad for her situation.

 

[EWalsh1029]

Well, I sat my girls tonight and had a father tell me he thinks I'm a horrible coach & he's going to the superintendent to get my fired ... because I sat his daughter for 2 quarters. She was sat because she was caught swearing at a team event (swearing representing our team/school/district is not allowed under my contract for the team)

 

[alexacheer2010]

Well, I sat my girls tonight and had a father tell me he thinks I'm a horrible coach & he's going to the superintendent to get my fired ... because I sat his daughter for 2 quarters. She was sat because she was caught swearing at a team event (swearing representing our team/school/district is not allowed under my contract for the team)

As long as the principal/AD knows about your contract, I think you will get backed up by the school. Ugh parents need to understand the importance of rules and teach kids by example (aka NOT what that dad did today).