High School Cheerleader's Punishment

[MyDaughterCheers]

UKCheerdad, where the school felt just in punishing the girls is that the sign is posted on school property, so therefore the photo was taken on school property.

What the school has done is open a Pandora's Box. The girls have received a lot of support from the student body and some people are extremely upset about them getting in so much trouble, that they have been printing photos off of Facebook taken on school property, in school uniforms, etc., and turning them in. I think that is a little ridiculous, but it is being done. I don't believe that the students feel that the girls are innocent. I think they feel that them getting in trouble for a private photo posted on facebook was a violation of their privacy and they realize that it could be any one of them. Further, I think that almost every kid in the school knows that they have made inappropriate gestures and such and thinks that the school is being too harsh.

As for the volleyball team, the same applies to them. FB is something that canot be monitored for every single teenager in the US. They made unwise and unkind statements on a public social media site. Were they acting as represntatives of the school or as individuals? That to me is a HUGE distinction.

Exactly. I don't really feel that the school has the right to make that distinction. Unfortunately, the cheerleaders are held to a higher standard in that school, and the school has deemed their actions as inappropriate. I do believe their punishment was too harsh for what they did, but they will take it with grace and show the school that they truly are the leaders they are expected to be. I think the school administration has decided to try to stomp out what they deem to be facebook bullying in one fell swoop. I believe they feel if they punish the cheerleaders so harshly, it will send a message to the rest of the student body. Yes, they were wrong in what they did, but I do believe they are being made an example of, so perhaps are being punished more severely than necessary.

Alexis, you are correct that it was retaliation. The girls admitted to that the first time they were questioned. That is why they are in so much trouble, because the school said they were "targeting" another group of students.

 

[tntdynomite]

@UKCheerdad, if what they did was private and would STAY private I don't think the school would take such a harsh stand. I teach 6th grade and the stuff they post online usually blows up at school when they are actually face to face, and therefore causes disruptions to the learning environment. Schools have to take a stand because they will have to deal with the aftermath whether they want to or not. And we have all heard stories of potential employers looking at someone's facebook or twitter and deciding NOT to hire that person. You can't be too careful with what you post online because it is out there for everyone to see. It's good that they learn this lesson now.

 

[Alexis Dayton]

Alexis, you are correct that it was retaliation. The girls admitted to that the first time they were questioned. That is why they are in so much trouble, because the school said they were "targeting" another group of students.

I've always been of the opinion if you act like a bully then you should be punished. That being said I have zero tolerance for discrimination/harassment.

 

[UKCheerdad]

tnt, the only difference between now and when I was in school is we fought it out and got over it, ya know? What was the big carryover that teachers had to deal with back then? Was it worse or (as I suspect) the teachers didn't know about the fights I got into after school.

So, to prevent the stuff from blowing up at school, you are going to do what? Hire a FB/Twitter monitor full time to see what kids are posting about others that might blow up at school? Please, answer my question as to where this all ends. FB has replaced the playground or notes passed in school as the way kids talk to and about each other. Somebody better have a reasonable way to deal with this or the thought police will soon begin recruiting. Do you see where I am coming from?

One side in this particular example got caught. It APPEARS the other side did not get caught. So in this case, it becomes she/she said! The administration is going after the ones for whom they have "proof." The administration hasn't solved anything.

I'm not saying the kids shouldn't learn a lesson, but when personal/private activities become the school's business, we've tread down a scary path toward having Big Brother in our homes 24/7.

 

[MyDaughterCheers]

I've always been of the opinion if you act like a bully then you should be punished. That being said I have zero tolerance for discrimination/harassment.

I'm not sure what you're saying? Do you think the cheerleaders bear sole responsibility?

 

[MyDaughterCheers]

UKCHeerdad, I wish I could have you talk to the school. Your posts make so much sense and I agree 110% with you.

 

[Alexis Dayton]

I'm not sure what you're saying? Do you think the cheerleaders bear sole responsibility?

The cheerleader's and volleyball player's who were involved bear responsibility.

 

[nhgurlnh]

At the school I went to, all athletes signed an agreement with the state athletic association (MIAA) that basically help us (athletes) to a higher standard during our season than other students who aren't playing a sport during that season. The agreement consisted of the following-
-No substance use
-No being in the presence of alcohol, drugs, etc.
-No harassment, bullying, etc.
-Respect for all sports teams within school, league, etc
and I forget the rest.
Whether the athlete was in a uniform or not, if he or she violated this agreement, they would be removed from the team.

I'm interested in knowing if the athletes at this school signed a similar agreement. If so, the cheerleaders and volleyball players would both be violating it.

 

[Alexis Dayton]

At the school I went to, all athletes signed an agreement with the state athletic association (MIAA) that basically help us (athletes) to a higher standard during our season than other students who aren't playing a sport during that season. The agreement consisted of the following-
-No substance use
-No being in the presence of alcohol, drugs, etc.
-No harassment, bullying, etc.
-Respect for all sports teams within school, league, etc
and I forget the rest.
Whether the athlete was in a uniform or not, if he or she violated this agreement, they would be removed from the team.

I'm interested in knowing if the athletes at this school signed a similar agreement. If so, the cheerleaders and volleyball players would both be violating it.

Thank you for also making the exact same points that I posted.

 

[AScheer]

I suggest the coach put some sort of standard or rule in place regarding issues like this and what behavior is expected of them. On my squad the expectations of how you act and what you do in public or on social media sites is spelled out with what the consequences are. Girls and parents know upfront before they tryout that the pages and the content are monitored to make sure they are representing the team and school in a positive light. I rarely get their pages unless I have a feeling something is going on or am told I need to have a look. After coaching a few years with the program I don't have to check, you would be surprised at how many people get in touch with me to tell me so and so posted blank. It comes from alumni and parents who just want to continue the reputation we've built and not see it ruined by Suzy and her promiscuous adventures & drama. I think a lot of it is just letting them know what you expect of them. They are teenagers and if no one ever told them before - hey it might not be a good idea to post that - then their common sense part of the brain probably was on hold that day.

 

[nhgurlnh]

Thank you for also making the exact same points that I posted.

I was specifically asking if the school requires all athletes to sign a zero tolerance policy, a question for MyDaughterCheers. You mentioned a contract between the school and athletes, but did not ask my question.

I will be more clear with my question now.

I may have completely missed you answering this question, MyDaughterCheers, but- Can you explain what the athletic department has in terms of a contract or agreement with all of its athletes?

 

[MyDaughterCheers]

They are teenagers and if no one ever told them before - hey it might not be a good idea to post that - then their common sense part of the brain probably was on hold that day.

That is so true. While I believe that every girl involved probably knew there was a chance the picture would end up on facebook, I don't think the ones that didn't post it should be held accountable for it being posted. I believe they should be held accountable for what they did, but not for the photo being posted.

To answer the question about the rules - There is a set of guidelines that outlines drugs, alcohol, sexual behavior, etc., but when it comes to social media, it vaguely states, "improper behavior will not be tolerated" so it leaves what is considered improper to be a judgement call. I think we can all agree that this was improper behavior; however, as I stated before, the school has opened a pandora's box. There was one football player that had explicit photos on his facebook page that were taken in the school gym during football camp and that was brought up during the discipline meeting. The football player later posted on his facebook page that the school "is lame for threatening me over a facebook picture" and removed the photos. The player (and all players in the photo) played last night. END OF DISCIPLINE. Very, very frustrating!

 

[AScheer]

That is so true. While I believe that every girl involved probably knew there was a chance the picture would end up on facebook, I don't think the ones that didn't post it should be held accountable for it being posted. I believe they should be held accountable for what they did, but not for the photo being posted.

To answer the question about the rules - There is a set of guidelines that outlines drugs, alcohol, sexual behavior, etc., but when it comes to social media, it vaguely states, "improper behavior will not be tolerated" so it leaves what is considered improper to be a judgement call. I think we can all agree that this was improper behavior; however, as I stated before, the school has opened a pandora's box. There was one football player that had explicit photos on his facebook page that were taken in the school gym during football camp and that was brought up during the discipline meeting. The football player later posted on his facebook page that the school "is lame for threatening me over a facebook picture" and removed the photos. The player (and all players in the photo) played last night. END OF DISCIPLINE. Very, very frustrating!

It can be very frustrating when things aren't fair across the board. Out our coaches meeting last week the AD told us that they were working on a set of guidelines that each team will have to adopt into their own rules. Its basic stuff like policies on grades, missing school, inappropriate behavior etc so that kids on one team that do something are punished the same way that kids on the other team are. We had issues last year with 2 kids - one basketball, one wrestling. The wrestler was benched the bball star had no consequences, both did the same action. They're hoping to eliminate this problem. Maybe something like this could work at your school?

 

[tntdynomite]

tnt, the only difference between now and when I was in school is we fought it out and got over it, ya know? What was the big carryover that teachers had to deal with back then? Was it worse or (as I suspect) the teachers didn't know about the fights I got into after school.

It's worse now than when I was in school becasue the bullying usually stayed at school. The internet has made it possible for kids to bully others 24-7. A bullied kid can't get a break even at home. So when a student brings facebook or twitter messages to a teacher or administrator, and they are crying their eyes out distressed because they can't take it anymore then what are we supposed to do? Ignore it and tell them we can't do anything because it's private? Or tell them that the bully needs to be caught in school in order to recieve a consequense? More often than not the facbook messages back up what teachers suspect is happening at school, but we don't have any hard proof.

And the cheerleaders in question were on school property when they took the picture and should have been punished when the picture was turned in.

And boys are more prone to fight and forget it. Girls aren't built that way. There will be back talking, mean notes passed, petty arguments (but not physical fights), horrible facebook messages, etc. all year long. Girls don't forget as easily and have a terrible time letting stuff go.

So, to prevent the stuff from blowing up at school, you are going to do what? Hire a FB/Twitter monitor full time to see what kids are posting about others that might blow up at school? Please, answer my question as to where this all ends. FB has replaced the playground or notes passed in school as the way kids talk to and about each other. Somebody better have a reasonable way to deal with this or the thought police will soon begin recruiting. Do you see where I am coming from?

I see where you are coming from, but if someone brings it to your attention, the teachers and administators can't ignore it because they are the adults that are supposed to watch out for the well being of the students. Unfortunately there are far too many parents that don't see anything wrong with bullying over the internet and won't patrol their kids internet activity even if it was brought to their attention. So I'm not saying hire some internet police, but don't ignore if a student brings something to your attention that was done at school or could disrupt the learning environment.

I'm not saying the kids shouldn't learn a lesson, but when personal/private activities become the school's business, we've tread down a scary path toward having Big Brother in our homes 24/7.

If it was the school that was going out searching for these things that would be true, but these are their facebook "friends" that are bringing these pictures and posts to the attention of the principal. If the kids don't post things that they know will be offensive to a big chunk of the people on their friends list then there wouldn't be a problem. They posted the picture to get a negative reaction and got caught. As far as the volleyball team not getting caught, well not everyone gets a ticket for speeding either. There's only so much that can be done. The cheerleaders are good kids and will hopefully learn a lesson. I'm sure the volleyball players are good kids too and will hopefully learn from this example. If not they will likely be the next caught.

 

[PghxCheer2]

@UKCheerdad I came from a school that was exactly the type you're talking about and can I just say I totally agree. The school administration was never involved unless somebody was going to end up dead. It literally had to be some sort of bomb threat, Hit List, or illegal drug usage on school property during school hours for them to ever get involved. The cheerleaders at our school are constantly made fun of. But instead of flicking everyone off, they've learned to just laugh it off as a team together. You didn't see the USASF suspending anybody from Worlds when the infamous "Dead CEA Skeleton" got posted on facebook a few weeks before worlds a couple years ago. It was clear what gym it came from, but like normal citizens, everyone just went on with the rest of their lives. If I was one of the cheerleaders on that team and came to my parents saying "These volleyball players think my butt looks fat in my spandex." My parents would say "Haha, now tell us the truth." One thing I learned in HS is that people are way too overly dramatic, and very few girls are just TRULY mean-spirited people. And those that are don't have friends anyway, because a truly mean-spirited person would just talk about "their friends" behind their back too. Something tells me this started far before an ugly practice uniform. And if it didn't, sorry to say, but those cheerleaders are just being too sensitive....

Long Story Short: This should be between the girls and maybe a guidance counselor, but bringing administration into this? I feel like there's bigger problems to deal with at any given school across the country.