High School Cheerleader's Punishment

[MyDaughterCheers]

Something tells me this started far before an ugly practice uniform. And if it didn't, sorry to say, but those cheerleaders are just being too sensitive....
No, it truly started over spandex and some rude comments made by a volleyball player to the cheerleaders. Then one of the volleyball players posted on her facebook that they shouldn't be wearing spandex and several of the other volleyball players started posting that they were sl*uts and wh*ores. A few days later, the photo was taken and posted. Apparently it was only posted for a very short time. I found out that the mom of the girl who posted it saw it and made her take it down. In the meantime, it had been printed by someone else. So the volleyball players threw the first stone, so to speak, and the cheerleaders foolishly threw the second.

As I've stated numerous times, the whole thing was stupid, ridiculous and wrong. @tntdynomite - I feel like I have to correct that ONE girl posted the photo. However, I do agree with you that when someone comes to their school upset over something like this, it needs to be addressed. The "funniest" part of the whole thing to me? It has come out who turned the photo into the school. It happened to be the mom of one of the biggest bullies in the entire school. This is a girl who has been suspended for fighting on school property more than once, and who has been suspended for - are you ready? - giving the finger to a teacher. But now, when the tables are turned, it's offensive. The mom turning the cheerleaders in was clearly a vendetta. Does it make it right what they did? NO. But again, this whole thing is ridiculous.

 

[UKCheerdad]

tnt, I understand, but lets follow your logic to its ultimate conclusion: Someone could bring a FB post every single day. Heck, lots of kids could bring in FB posts every day and ask the teachers do something about it. This could be neverending and all teachers and administrators would have to deal with is FB posts all day long.

So let's look at the situation that "MyDaughterrCheers" has shared with us. If the teachers/administrators would have said from the get go TO THIS MOM, it would have been over a long time ago! They bowed down to a mom who was trying to settle a score.

A school is not a courtroom, it cannot collect evidence and it cannot subpeona witnesses. Unless they are willing to spend a lot more time defusing these situations, they need to develop a plan to knwo when to act and when not to. This should have been referred back to the Cheerleading Coach and Volleyball Coach. They should listen to ALL sides and weigh all the accusations or they should have stayed out of completely! It go too hot, they couldn't corroborate the evidence and they refused to listen to the "testimony" of a group that was also "attacked" on FB. They acted like a judge who took the case and then decided to recuse himself.

 

[MyDaughterCheers]

UKCheerdad, you are the voice of logic in this situation. I wish I could not only shimmy your post a 100 times, but I wish I could take you to school to talk to the administrators!!

 

[tntdynomite]

tnt, I understand, but lets follow your logic to its ultimate conclusion: Someone could bring a FB post every single day. Heck, lots of kids could bring in FB posts every day and ask the teachers do something about it. This could be neverending and all teachers and administrators would have to deal with is FB posts all day long.

So let's look at the situation that "MyDaughterrCheers" has shared with us. If the teachers/administrators would have said from the get go TO THIS MOM, it would have been over a long time ago! They bowed down to a mom who was trying to settle a score.

A school is not a courtroom, it cannot collect evidence and it cannot subpeona witnesses. Unless they are willing to spend a lot more time defusing these situations, they need to develop a plan to knwo when to act and when not to. This should have been referred back to the Cheerleading Coach and Volleyball Coach. They should listen to ALL sides and weigh all the accusations or they should have stayed out of completely! It go too hot, they couldn't corroborate the evidence and they refused to listen to the "testimony" of a group that was also "attacked" on FB. They acted like a judge who took the case and then decided to recuse himself.

It's never-ending anyway. Whether a kid brings in proof that they are being bullied or not I spend a whole lot of time diffusing situations. And to me this particular cheer/volleyball situation is small potatoes compared to a child that is constantly mistreated by their classmates (and most of what I posted in this thread is about the bigger picture). If a student brings something to my attention I at least have the responsibility to hear them out and try to improve their situation. In my school of 1100 kids we have 2 administrators whose primary responsibility is handling discipline. The first thing they would do is make parents aware of the situation, but if the particular incident that they have proof of took place on school property or is harming students then they would step in with a school punishment. Or even if a student brought in a facebook conversation where another student discussed their plan to bring in alcohol or a knife. The school has a right and a duty to keep students safe by checking out these allegations. I really don't see a kid bringing in proof of their ongoing torment any different.​

On the other side of the coin I know a teacher that looked at a student’s facebook, was alarmed by what he saw and discussed it with administration. There was nothing they could do. It wasn't on school property, the student wasn't harming any other students, and they weren't in danger of harming themselves. So no one is saying that schools should be policing student facebook pages. Sometimes it is none of their business. ​

Speaking on the current situation, if a kid makes it school business by posting pictures taken on school property then the school does have the right to discipline as they see fit. They have an obligation really, the school has to act in loco parentis. They are responsible for the student from the moment they leave the house in the morning until the moment they step over the threshold after school. If a kid decides to get off the bus and go around the corner to fight someone then the school can discipline them if they find out. By disciplining the cheerleaders for something that happened on school property they are expressing their rights.​

 

[SharkDad]

@UKCheerdad I see yout "old school" point but I have to disagree with you. These days schools feel like they can't infringe on parent rights and parents send their kids to school thinking that is where they will learn discipline.

I don't necessarily agree with how the school dealt with it, but I feel like it is very important that any adult that comes in contact with kids these days needs to be an example and show them when their behavior is not appropriate.

 

[MyDaughterCheers]

So the saga continues. . . I was just texted a photo posted on Facebook 6 hours agos. It is one of the varsity cheerleaders, in the school, in front of the band sign, with her middle finger extended. The photo was taken during the cheerleader sleepover that was held last week.

My very first thought is that this girl is really, really stupid. After what happened to the other cheerleaders and the school having had meetings with ALL of the cheerleaders about this very thing, why in the world would she post her OWN photo doing the same thing??? I am speechless.

 

[Emily Jane]

So the saga continues. . . I was just texted a photo posted on Facebook 6 hours agos. It is one of the varsity cheerleaders, in the school, in front of the band sign, with her middle finger extended. The photo was taken during the cheerleader sleepover that was held last week.

My very first thought is that this girl is really, really stupid. After what happened to the other cheerleaders and the school having had meetings with ALL of the cheerleaders about this very thing, why in the world would she post her OWN photo doing the same thing??? I am speechless.

Wow.

 

[Alexis Dayton]

So the saga continues. . . I was just texted a photo posted on Facebook 6 hours agos. It is one of the varsity cheerleaders, in the school, in front of the band sign, with her middle finger extended. The photo was taken during the cheerleader sleepover that was held last week.

My very first thought is that this girl is really, really stupid. After what happened to the other cheerleaders and the school having had meetings with ALL of the cheerleaders about this very thing, why in the world would she post her OWN photo doing the same thing??? I am speechless.

After this new one I would remove that girl from the squad. The whole squad had a lecture and then she did what she did.

 

[tntdynomite]

So the saga continues. . . I was just texted a photo posted on Facebook 6 hours agos. It is one of the varsity cheerleaders, in the school, in front of the band sign, with her middle finger extended. The photo was taken during the cheerleader sleepover that was held last week.

My very first thought is that this girl is really, really stupid. After what happened to the other cheerleaders and the school having had meetings with ALL of the cheerleaders about this very thing, why in the world would she post her OWN photo doing the same thing??? I am speechless.

Ugh, this is why I coach college...back to the college section I go!

 

[MyDaughterCheers]

Alexis I think I have to agree with you. The school had meetings with each class discussing this stuff, and the cheer coach sat down with each squad and brought it up again. To me, it's almost like she's saying "eff you" to the school. Kids are so not smart sometimes.

 

[UKCheerdad]

All, please don't get me wrong. I am not in any way condoning the actiosn of the young people. They do need good examples from parents, leaders, teachers and administrators. Lord knows they need as many positive role models as they can find. I agree 100% that they have to learn from their mistakes.

My only issue - and as it realtes to this particular topic - is that schools/teachers/administrators are being looked to at to do more than they are supposed to be doing. I know, I know the argument will be that if the parents won't do it, the schools have to do it. But look where we've already arrived - schools are teaching sex ed b/c parents won't talk to their kids about sex; school lunchrooms have started serving "healthy" foods b/c the gov't thinks we are too fat and doesn't trust us to make our own choices; schools are now looking at Facebook and suspending kids for comments made in the privacy of thier own homes.

What is next? That's all I'm asking.

 

[kristenthegreat]

Here's the thing: It's called 'social' media. 95% of what kids post on facebook is NOT private, and even if it is, the moment they change their settings down the road it's easily searchable. Anything sent over an internet connection STAYS online forever. Even IF it's 'deleted' off facebook, it's still in there. Even if you delete your profile off facebook, there is still a record existing of all the posts you made, pictures you uploaded etc that can be brought back up at any time.

It's often posted FROM a private setting but onto a PUBLIC site..which is where the whole issue is.

 

[Alexis Dayton]

Here's the thing: It's called 'social' media. 95% of what kids post on facebook is NOT private, and even if it is, the moment they change their settings down the road it's easily searchable. Anything sent over an internet connection STAYS online forever. Even IF it's 'deleted' off facebook, it's still in there. Even if you delete your profile off facebook, there is still a record existing of all the posts you made, pictures you uploaded etc that can be brought back up at any time.

It's often posted FROM a private setting but onto a PUBLIC site..which is where the whole issue is.

I only have one thing to say. Don't post something online that you will later regret. It truly is that simple.

 

[gymcatmomx2]

I just read this entire post so I'm coming to the game late. I agree with UKCheerdad that it's not the responsibility of the school administration to monitor FB pages. I believe that as parents that it's our responsibility to monitor our children's FB pages as well as their text messages and their twitter accounts. I have passwords to all email/FB/twitter accounts including cell phones and I logon to their FB accounts DAILY!!! I monitor their text messages weekly. It's my opinion that their behavior (volleyball players AND cheerleaders) was in poor taste and that the situation was blown way out of proportion. If one of my daughters had behaved like that, they wouldn't need the administration to step in.... my punishment would be bad enough.

 

[kristenthegreat]

I just read this entire post so I'm coming to the game late. I agree with UKCheerdad that it's not the responsibility of the school administration to monitor FB pages. I believe that as parents that it's our responsibility to monitor our children's FB pages as well as their text messages and their twitter accounts. I have passwords to all email/FB/twitter accounts including cell phones and I logon to their FB accounts DAILY!!! I monitor their text messages weekly. It's my opinion that their behavior (volleyball players AND cheerleaders) was in poor taste and that the situation was blown way out of proportion. If one of my daughters had behaved like that, they wouldn't need the administration to step in.... my punishment would be bad enough.

It's a good thing you're that responsible, because many parents AREN'T. Unfortunately, it's the bad majority who spoil the bunch and are the reason teachers are stuck in a position to be the disciplinarians (not their job) or go generally outside their reach of what they SHOULD be doing (and quite frankly, I can think of at least 100 things I'd rather be doing as a teacher than having to comb my students facebooks for trouble). Also the reason why the government has to step in on so many issues they shouldn't be touching. There was a new CNN piece done that I absolutely loved about how many bad, overbearing, in-denial parents are driving teachers away from the profession..makes for an intriguing read. Sort of a side note that popped into my head after your post.