Is This Normal Coaching?

[Carolina Cheer]

I'm wondering if the way my coaches act is the way that coaches act at other gyms. Our coaches yell at us a lot and say things like, "What's the matter with you?" and "tell me why you deserve to be on this team" and "did you really just do that" and "I'm so frustrated with you" when we bust or balk tumbling or drop stunts. They threaten to kick off the girls who are struggling with skills or flying. One of my coaches told us to get our heads out of our a$$ at the last competition. We are a pretty good team with youth and junior age kids on it and we don't talk back to our coaches. They just get mad when we aren't perfect.
Do your coaches act like that, too?

 

[Kyle.Ing]

Coming from both a coach and an athletes persepective, there is a limit and a line of censorship that coaches need to maintain. The coaches that degrade and belittle consistently have a demeanor and are the reasons gyms have the reps they do.. I ALWAYS give my teams Positive, Then Critiques, then Positives again. I am stern with critiques, but do NOT belittle any one individual or make them feel insecure. A lot of coaches coach other how they've been coached. My teams have stipulations if they dropped/bawk/miss anything. However, that is really unacceptable, and should be dealt with by the owner.

 

[Audrey]

My high school coach sometimes talks to us like that. But just because there are other coaches that do it doesn't make it ok. I think it's absolutely unacceptable for coaches to treat athletes that way. Not only is it bad for the athletes, it's terrible business practice. Many of the girls have said they're not coming back if we have the same coach again next year.

 

[peytonnmariee]

my coach is worse.....baha. but i mean i know they dont mean it, well like most of them time. but they dont mean to purposly yell and stuff...idk

 

[whatsarisalee]

I've had coaches yell like that before in cheer. Even worse for lacrosse.

 

[Mamarazzi]

Whether common or not, it's just how some coaches are. I try to remind my cp that she should listen, take the important parts (like, "point your toe this way,") and throw out the rest (like the proximity of your head to your behind.) Cp is lucky enough to have a coach that smiles, yells, supports and shows love at competitions as much as he hollers in practice, though. Everything he does is with 100% emotion.

 

[MissBee]

As a parent and coach I find this appalling. I would never allow my child to be on a team with a coach like that. It's abusive. There is a difference between yelling to be heard (across a loud gym or a field) and yelling AT someone out of frustration. Profanity has no place (now, I've heard it at the professional and college level-that's different....even in certain cases with a HS team it could be OK depending on the situation)....but at the Junior and Youth levels, absolutely not.
Threatening to kick kids off? They do realize that the kid's tuition pays for their paycheck, right?

 

[gabsfeld]

A coach needs to be professional towards the children they are teaching. I think there is a line in which many coaches try not to cross. They should not threaten you over dropping a stunt, and I'm sure they don't mean it. However they may be going about it in the wrong way.

 

[Mom Jeans]

Depends on the level, I dont have a problem at all with coaches yelling, and if someone is holding the team back maybe they should be on another team. Not okay for really young kids, I also dont think kids should be coddled. If I didnt like it, I would switch gyms....If a coach was too nice and the kids didnt respect him/her and on the mat they always blew it, I'd leave that gym...to each his own. Personally I like the kids to be kept in check and the parents too.

 

[whatsarisalee]

Depends on the level, I dont have a problem at all with coaches yelling, and if someone is holding the team back maybe they should be on another team. Not okay for really young kids, I also dont think kids should be coddled. If I didnt like it, I would switch gyms....If a coach was too nice and the kids didnt respect him/her and on the mat they always blew it, I'd leave that gym...to each his own. Personally I like the kids to be kept in check and the parents too.

Amen!!!! And truthfully we probably need some more of this.

 

[Fionaelite]

Im all for strict coaching, but there is a difference to being strict and just degrading athletes.
The way I see it, its okay for a coach to criticise someones skills, e.g. Suzie, I told you yesterday, and earlier this practice that you snap on 3 not 5, you need to listen and concentrate or your going to be moved to the back.
BUT its not okay to criticize someones personality, and general self because of something e.g. Suzie you are just the most stupid child I have ever worked with. I tell you time and time again, that you click on 5 not 3 and still your tiny little brain never seems to get the message.
Both get the same message across, that suzie needs to click two counts later, but one leaves an athlete knowing that she needs to work on something or there will be a consequence, and another leaves them feeling like they are worthless to the team.
Just my opinion, but I know how I would rather be coached.

 

[Matt Faherty]

I'm wondering if the way my coaches act is the way that coaches act at other gyms. Our coaches yell at us a lot and say things like, "What's the matter with you?" and "tell me why you deserve to be on this team" and "did you really just do that" and "I'm so frustrated with you" when we bust or balk tumbling or drop stunts. They threaten to kick off the girls who are struggling with skills or flying. One of my coaches told us to get our heads out of our a$$ at the last competition. We are a pretty good team with youth and junior age kids on it and we don't talk back to our coaches. They just get mad when we aren't perfect.
Do your coaches act like that, too?

When I first started cheering I was 17. One of my coaches in particular was an amazing choreographer, and had a very effective at getting what she wanted done. I mean, she was only 22 and put upstate NY on the all-star map by bringing the region's first team to the USASF Worlds.The issue was that she was very negative in her coaching. She would scream, insult, and threaten athletes of losing their place if they messed up. Her athletes would feel personally attacked when corrected and that caused a negative atmosphere in the gym that would polarize feelings towards her. She would have a close following of cheerleaders, with similar attitudes, who would never leave her, but on the other hand, competitor programs would use this as an advantage to recruit athletes who were frustrated. After 2 years I had also left this coach's program to join my friends who would not cheer in such a hostile environment.

A hand full of years passed since I last saw her before news came that she had left her program and would be joining the program I was currently in. At first I was nervous but when i saw her coaching again it was different. Instead of insulting, she would explain how her corrections would make the team better cheerleaders. Her drills and conditioning had a clear and concise point that she conveyed. She clearly stated what her expectations were and what consequences would result if athletes didn't meet them. Athletes were held responsible without feeling the fear of being belittled or embarrassed. This would make them want to preform their best because they want to, not because of fear of being shamed. In just a few years this coach have taken a 180 in attitude!
In my opinion the transition that occurred between this coach over the past 5 or so years is experience and education as a coach. She is a higher quality coach now and will continue to grow in the future.

Speaking from my own time as a coach I never stop learning. I am constantly learning how to how to communicate more effectively with my athletes, use different tools and drills to increase skill development, improving on how to motivate my athletes internally through positive reinforcement, and specific corrective feedback. It boils down to the coaches ability to ACT not REACT to a situation. The more prepared a coach is for a situation, by planning, and handling similar situations in the past, the more likely the coach will act in a way to fix the issue in a calm and effective manor.

Anyways, my point being is that sometimes a coach coming off negative does not necessarily mean they are a bad coach. I am am also not condoning negative coaching. But I am just making sure everyone realizes that it can be a sign of uncertainty in ability of the coach, inexperience, and anxiety that can turn the coach's tones hostile. My personal advise is to and athlete in this situation, to pull the coach aside privately, and in a polite way, tell the coach how his or negativity affects the team moral. Hopefully he/she will understand and make a conscious effort to control their temper. But that doesn't mean they are perfect and they will always be under control. if it slips just remember the coach is trying to make you better, whether it sounds it or not, and try to not take it as personal attack, but instead try to understand the underlying correction.

Hope this helps!
-Coach Matt

 

[christina3655]

coaches at my gym do NOT act like this and would probablly be fired if they did ..i am a coach and an athlete at my gym .. and while it can get frustrating at times... i try to use my personal experience as an example and use my knowledge to get on their level and let my athletes know that i understand how theyre feeling and i let them know they will be able to push through it if they want it bad enough ...i would never put an athlete down because of their lack of skill because that just reflects back on me and my coaching.. if a child doesnt have the skill i feel responsible because i was the one in charge of teaching it to them !!! ... i dont think negativatiy works

 

[level5allstar]

Coaches get frustrated sometimes! I think it's normal

 

[Mom Jeans]

Yelling to get someone to listen is diff than name calling, name calling i dont agree with, but in sports coaches yell at least all the sports I watch.