My CP is also 11 and struggled with mental blocks on and off since she was seven. After watching her struggle with them for two full years, we decided to take a year off from cheer when she was nine. At that time, a new cheer gym opened in our area and I was interested in getting her into flying classes. The owner said that he could help her, and that he was looking for a flyer on his Junior 2 team, so we decided to try it. Actually, we decided to have her try it-we told her she was going to a flight camp and then threw her right into practice (pretty evil, right?) Her major block had always been connecting a round off to a bhs. She had never progressed beyond that skill independently, even though she could throw a round off bhs tuck if she decided she wanted to. Slowly, we had watched her skills dwindle, until she was not even throwing a standing bhs. So within the first two weeks of starting the new program, she ended up getting her standing bhs back.
Over the course of that time, the gym we had left actually shut down and all of those athletes came over to our new gym. In addition to the junior 2 team, they also created a junior 3 team. Since all of her former teammates and friends were on it, I asked if she could be on it, and the coach agreed to it. If I had to make that decision again, I would have left her on the Junior 3 team. Over the next nine months we did countless privates (this is in addition to the countless privates we did the two years before with her block). We tried every tumbling instructor, every coach, etc. Her tumbling coach actually got to the point where he had to stop her privates because he was so frustrated that she would not throw her skills, when her tumbling was beautiful. After a few months off from privates, her coach asked us if she was ready to start up again, and she agreed. Within a few weeks of starting, the frustration was starting to kick in again. Then literally one day, she did a round off bhs. The coach did not even see it actually, as his back was turned and did not believe the other kiddo in the class who told him that she finally did it. Then, she did it again. Two days later, she was doing round off to three bhs. A week later, she had her round off bhs tuck on her own. They put her into the level 3 tumbling for US Finals, but she did not throw it there. But she regained her confidence and ended the season with throwing her round off bhs tuck at Summit. She has always been a kid who struggled with tumbling at competitions, so this was momentous.
As a result of that, and knowing her potential, she was placed on a J 3 team and a S 4 team for the next season. She was ecstatic, but had some tumbling issues right away when she changed teams. She worked through them, and got all of her level 4 tumbling this year, including standing tumbling to layout and specialty to layout. She had her moments throughout the season where she would not tumble in practice, but then was consistent during competition. I am not going got lie, in that I still cannot actually watch her tumble in competition. The one time I did this season, they competed at 8 am and she fell in her standing tumbling and did not throw her running (half the team had issues like that-no one should compete level 4 at 8 am). So I decided to go back to just looking away during tumbling and watching the video back-lol. Anyway, her local gym location ended up closing down (partly due to drama and partly due to the new D2 Summit rules) and she now goes up to another location, which is further. She is still finding her way and tumbling has regressed a bit, however that is par for the course with her. Actually to be honest, I am not exactly sure what she is doing in terms of tumbling, as I never ask her and am not present during classes. She was just very bewildered the first day of tumbling class, which happened to be an open gym (she hates open gyms) and she was getting a spot on her round off bhs layout last week at tumbling.
My point is, I don't believe there is any amount of tumbling classes or private lessons that can get a kid to tumble. It really has to come from within. I don't know what exactly triggered the change. I feel like my attitude helped a lot. I put a lot into her hands and tell her if she does not feel comfortable throwing a skill, then don't do it. This is a far cry from where I used to be. I was very emotionally invested, but now I never bring up tumbling unless she does. She sets her own goals and I let her have authority over it. I also never, ever watch tumbling classes, or even when they tumble during practice. I will walk out of the gym if it is happening when I happen to be there, and I do not even enter when dropping her off for tumbling. One thing that helped her was that she slowed the skills down when she was throwing them. So for example, she did a slower round off and then a slower back handspring. So she did a round off pause bhs. Then she made the pause smaller and smaller, until she was finally able to connect them. As long as your CP is enjoying cheer and wanting to be there, the best you can do is support her. We had put so much emphasis on tumbling, that when we took it away, she started to set her own goals. We have since stopped doing private lessons and due to the distance that we have from the gym, she only tumbles one day a week. I am not concerned about skill progression. My goal for her last year was that she stayed consistent from beginning to end. Even if she did not get one new skill, I was ok with that.
Sorry for the novel, but I know way too much about mental blocks-much more than I want to. All I can say is that I learned there is nothing extrinsically that can be done-it all has to come from within. Repetitions were helpful for her and she liked the counting. For example, she would have to throw 10 standing bhs for example, then 10 round off bhs, then 5 round off bhs tuck, etc. There were times literally when it would take the entire hour to get her to do 10 standing bhs. She still has that routine of warming up skills to get to the next ones.
If you have any other questions, please feel free to send me a message. Just know that it is best to be there for your child, but leave the coaching in the gym and cheer at the door. I just listen, but never ask-lol. Oh, and trust me, that is very hard. I remember dreading it when I would have to pick her up from the gym, because I never knew what we are walking in to. Once I resigned myself to be ok with no matter what was going on inside the doors, it made things much easier.
