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So my younger sister is a minor and she is currently being bullied by a classmates mom on social media. The reason for the bullying is freaking school cheer related and it’s ridiculous if you ask me. My sister has no idea that I am aware of the situation and I wouldn’t have known about honestly if one of the videos the mom made appeared on my for you page/interests page or whatever you wanna call it. I live in a completely different state then her and my parents so I wouldn’t be able to have a in face conversation with her until I fly back to the us mainland.

What is the best way about handling this? I know our parents need to be informed of this stand the school, but I also don’t want to blind side her with it and cause her to possibly shut not only myself out but also our parents.


Professional response as ex-coach and school employee: Talk to the school administration.

Not professional response: Take your earrings off and square up with her.

Additional option: law enforcement might not be able to DO anything but they may be able to if the videos are sexually inappropriate in nature as that is a crime.
 
Also coming from someone who has worked in schools for a while:

A mean mom is usually behind any mean bullying child.

Like nine out of 10 times.

Quite a few times I’ve been in discussions with teenage girls about bullying or just general bad and catty behavior and it comes up that someone’s MOM texted them, or some moms have a group chat, etc.

Or a favorite thing is for parents not to get directly involved but stoke the fire by “sneak dissing” or whatever they call it now on social media.

You know, posting about someone but not directly saying who it’s about but that person or anyone who knows the situation could obviously tell who it’s about. That way should the child or that child’s parents say “stop talking about my daughter”, the adult can then play innocent and say “I didn’t say her name this isn’t about her.”

For example, if Jenny JV and Vicky Varsity have a conflict, instead of posting “Oh my gosh that Jenny JV is so stupid and bad at cheerleading and my daughter hates her.” That parent would post “Wow imagine being a junior on JV it could never be my daughter lol”

It’s not directly naming Jenny, but anyone involved with the situation knows who it’s about.

It gets laughs, it keeps the situation going. Also then when Jenny brings it to my or another staff member’s attention, the parent then says “Wow it’s not even about her she’s just being sensitive.” The parent also knows that the child cannot be disciplined for that because an adult said it, not her.

Also problematic is the prevalence of anonymous twitters, Instagram, etc. There are there have been times where I am pretty sure a student is not behind an account and it HAS to be an adult. It’s just hard to prove.

Unfortunately there are parents who really enjoy being involved in their child’s drama instead of being an adult. There’s also a level of thinking mean girl type behavior is cute. I mean their favorite social media influencers and YouTubers and TikTokers “come for” people online so they think it’s cool. See also: putting down other girls for male attention, which is usually at the root of most issues.
 
So my younger sister is a minor and she is currently being bullied by a classmates mom on social media. The reason for the bullying is freaking school cheer related and it’s ridiculous if you ask me. My sister has no idea that I am aware of the situation and I wouldn’t have known about honestly if one of the videos the mom made appeared on my for you page/interests page or whatever you wanna call it. I live in a completely different state then her and my parents so I wouldn’t be able to have a in face conversation with her until I fly back to the us mainland.

What is the best way about handling this? I know our parents need to be informed of this stand the school, but I also don’t want to blind side her with it and cause her to possibly shut not only myself out but also our parents.

Engaging with a cyber bully is what they crave and it brings some type of perverse enjoyment. If your sister is responding to her, tell her to stop, if there's anything threatening report it to the police, and have her delete any responses or sub-tweets she may have made in return. Tell your sister to block her and let her know she can't control that parent's actions or anyone else's, but she can control her reaction. Tell your sister this parent has a mental illness, and it has nothing to do with her and everything to do with that parent's insecurities.

https://www.familytoday.com/family/why-bullies-bully-and-what-you-can-do-to-stop-it/
 
Engaging with a cyber bully is what they crave and it brings some type of perverse enjoyment. If your sister is responding to her, tell her to stop, if there's anything threatening report it to the police, and have her delete any responses or sub-tweets she may have made in return. Tell your sister to block her and let her know she can't control that parent's actions or anyone else's, but she can control her reaction. Tell your sister this parent has a mental illness, and it has nothing to do with her and everything to do with that parent's insecurities.

https://www.familytoday.com/family/why-bullies-bully-and-what-you-can-do-to-stop-it/


She hasn’t engaged she go has the lady and the daughter blocked on everything…but unfortunately you can’t block people in real life. We face timed late last night, after she got back from her school’s football game. She was talking about how she didn’t want to be the tattletale or the snitch as she calls but she finally did go to the school counselor about it. Some of the stuff has taken place on school groups(the mom recording her and making videos of her, and etc.)

it will hopefully be handled but we are also dealing with a lady and daughter who have never been told no a day in their lives and have also never been held accountable for their actions. A few other girls and guys on the cheer team, have ended coming forward with issues they have had with the same mom. I gathered from my sister it has a lot to do with “Karen’s”(no offense to anyone named Karen) daughter not getting the position on the team she was entitled to. That position is captain, and at the school my sister attends the team votes on who they feel could lead the team the best, and has good teamwork and leadership skills, and who can also help come up with ideas to help raise money and awareness for various charities in our town, state, and what not.
 
She hasn’t engaged she go has the lady and the daughter blocked on everything…but unfortunately you can’t block people in real life. We face timed late last night, after she got back from her school’s football game. She was talking about how she didn’t want to be the tattletale or the snitch as she calls but she finally did go to the school counselor about it. Some of the stuff has taken place on school groups(the mom recording her and making videos of her, and etc.)

it will hopefully be handled but we are also dealing with a lady and daughter who have never been told no a day in their lives and have also never been held accountable for their actions. A few other girls and guys on the cheer team, have ended coming forward with issues they have had with the same mom. I gathered from my sister it has a lot to do with “Karen’s”(no offense to anyone named Karen) daughter not getting the position on the team she was entitled to. That position is captain, and at the school my sister attends the team votes on who they feel could lead the team the best, and has good teamwork and leadership skills, and who can also help come up with ideas to help raise money and awareness for various charities in our town, state, and what not.

I look at this as: there’s an adult perpetrator, so all bets are off.

You have to watch yourself when dealing with a teenage bully because they’re still kids, they’re still learning, etc.

None of those things exist with an adult who should ALREADY KNOW BETTER.

I know the most mature route would be to take the high road. But it appears to me this mom and daughter have been given the advantage of the high road too many times, because they’re still pulling this crap and haven’t learned anything. So from where I’m sitting, you can raise whatever hell you’d like. Clearly those two need to learn or they’ll just continue to make others’ lives miserable.
 
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She hasn’t engaged she go has the lady and the daughter blocked on everything…but unfortunately you can’t block people in real life. We face timed late last night, after she got back from her school’s football game. She was talking about how she didn’t want to be the tattletale or the snitch as she calls but she finally did go to the school counselor about it. Some of the stuff has taken place on school groups(the mom recording her and making videos of her, and etc.)

it will hopefully be handled but we are also dealing with a lady and daughter who have never been told no a day in their lives and have also never been held accountable for their actions. A few other girls and guys on the cheer team, have ended coming forward with issues they have had with the same mom. I gathered from my sister it has a lot to do with “Karen’s”(no offense to anyone named Karen) daughter not getting the position on the team she was entitled to. That position is captain, and at the school my sister attends the team votes on who they feel could lead the team the best, and has good teamwork and leadership skills, and who can also help come up with ideas to help raise money and awareness for various charities in our town, state, and what not.

I hope your parents are aware so they can provide emotional support for your sister.
 
I look at this as: there’s an adult perpetrator, so all bets are off.

You have to watch yourself when dealing with a teenage bully because they’re still kids, they’re still learning, etc.

None of those things exist with an adult who should ALREADY KNOW BETTER.

I know the most mature route would be to take the high road. But it appears to me this mom and daughter have been given the advantage of the high road too many times, because they’re still pulling this crap and haven’t learned anything. So from where I’m sitting, you can raise whatever hell you’d like. Clearly those two need to learn or they’ll just continue to make others’ lives miserable.

It's not about taking the high road, it's about not providing the drama this adult craves because of their own issues. I get it, the first reaction as a mom, including myself, is to come out with both barrels blazing, but that's what they want.

Side note: @Thinkpositivethoughts your sister obviously possesses qualities this mom seeks, not only for her daughter, but also for herself. I stand by the fact drama needs oxygen to stay alive and this is a mental issue on that mom's part. Don't feed the beast.
 
It's not about taking the high road, it's about not providing the drama this adult craves because of their own issues. I get it, the first reaction as a mom, including myself, is to come out with both barrels blazing, but that's what they want.

Side note: @Thinkpositivethoughts your sister obviously possesses qualities this mom seeks, not only for her daughter, but also for herself. I stand by the fact drama needs oxygen to stay alive and this is a mental issue on that mom's part. Don't feed the beast.

I get the wanting attention bit and agree that’s what’s at least partly at play here, but I was more talking about doing something that pushes her from “I’m enjoying this because I got a rise out of someone,” to “This isn’t what I bargained for because now my personal and professional lives are being affected and it isn’t fun.” And EVERYONE has that point, even attention-starved adult bullies.

And since what we’re talking about here is tantamount to child abuse, I would have no qualms going in that direction. But that’s just me.
 
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I get the wanting attention bit and agree that’s what’s at least partly at play here, but I was more talking about doing something that pushes her from “I’m enjoying this because I got a rise out of someone,” to “This isn’t what I bargained for because now my personal and professional lives are being affected and it isn’t fun.” And EVERYONE has that point, even attention-starved adult bullies.

And since what we’re talking about here is tantamount to child abuse, I would have no qualms going in that direction. But that’s just me.

The poster said she was taking recordings and videos of her (I'm assuming the sister) and posting them in the group. The sister thinks this about her sister being the captain (perhaps the process of becoming captain), so it sounds as if her videos and statements are placed in hopes of making her sister look bad and getting others to agree or join in. Ultimately, she said other cheerleaders have come forward about this mom, so it sounds like they are handling it in a good way.
 
It seems like the time period of 2013 and 2014 were vapid. Reality shows, doctor soaps, and cop shows were the dominant forces on TV. Most college students I knew were interested in becoming rich or watching reality TV.



We stopped aiming for the stars.

Now TV is in a flood of swords, dragons, and spaceships.
https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/apple-tv-s-all-mankind-takes-lesson-mars-rover-ncna1258406

https://variety.com/2021/tv/reviews/foundation-review-apple-plus-asimov-1235073033/

https://www.tor.com/2021/09/02/amazons-the-wheel-of-time-trailer-is-here/

https://www.tor.com/2021/08/23/netf...lease-date-november-19th-first-look-pictures/

https://www.tor.com/2021/09/08/star-trek-strange-new-worlds-casting-announcements-uhura-chapel/

Why did people back then felt more pressure to conform to stereotypes?

Why not be athletic, fun loving, and yet smart? Like these badass people called "astronauts".
 
And the astro documentaries keep on coming!





It seems like there has been a resurgence of interest and a push to a get a new generation interested in space. A new restaurant at EPCOT.


news-092221h-lg.jpg




 
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