All-Star The Appropriate Way To Move Gyms.

[PullandPray23]

oh my goodness theres a few people whom id love to see this.

*oh and dont play the victim card when people get upset...they have every right to be

 

[Cheer Cougar]

Don't feel bad about your decision, if you believe in your heart that it was the best decision for your family!

 

[tumbleyoda]

I think some things are just common courtesy. It has nothing to do with bowing down to a coach or asking them to approve of your decision. Likewise owners and coaches must understand that they have to work every day to keep people coming to their gym and should not keep people that do not want to belong to their gym - even if they don't want them to leave.

Even if you leave at the end of the year, many coaches are ALREADY in planning mode for next year. They are already thinking about whom they may like to try in certain spots and put in a different position. They are already in their minds if not on paper thinking about next year teams. Letting them know as soon as you know lets them re-adjust their thinking so they are not counting on your son or daughter to return when you know for sure they are not. They may not plan to do that Jr 4 or Senior Open 5 team if a certain amount of kids inform them in advance they are not coming back. Of course you don't know who may come in the door but you can never count on that.

If you leave do it gracefully and in person. As has been stated gyms close, merge, and partner with other gyms. Coaches move from one gym to another. You may have to deal with the same owners and coaches again. It is always best to leave at the end of the season. But if this is not possible, it must be with a personal conversation with the coaches/owners. Not a telephone call, e-mail, or letting it be found out through social media that Suzy is taking her tic toc to another gym. Be upfront and communicate. Leave any and all concerns all on the table and if there is a balance due pay it before you leave or make suitable arrangements and get it in writing.

When you leave, go. Seriously. If you do not want to be at Gym A anymore fine. But don't act like you still want to be there, want to know everything that is going on, how the new teams are looking, where they are competing, etc. That bugs coaches more than they will ever tell you. You can be cordial and respectful to them without being nosy.

Say no to the temptation to try to pull other members with you because your new gym is offering a special discount to you and them if you do. This is a very old recruiting trick and most gyms are aware of what their competitors do to try to undermine their business. Don't become a pawn in that game. It will get real ugly, real fast and you will get caught up in it.

Remember that every gym has a tattletale, so be upfront and honest about why you are leaving. When you go to your new gym and tell them why you really left your old gym, it will get back to your old gym. It happens every time. This will always generate bad feelings. especially if it is a different reason from what you told the owners and coaches when you left.

Coaches and owners - let them go. It is hard when you have invested so much of yourself into an athlete and they or their parents treat it as a mere business transaction. It hurts even worse when they hardly acknowledge they learned anything at your gym when you know that if it wasn't for the training they received at your gym, they may not have made their dream team at the new gym. But clinging onto the rejection will only make you bitter in the long run. No matter why they left - whether true or false - Let it go. Take a deep breath, scream in the woods if you must, then double down on your efforts to continue to grow your program with those who believe in you and want to be a part of what you have to offer. If anything make your program such that they wish they never left.

If they come to you and shoot straight, offer them your support and even contact the new gym to let them know that they are on the way. If coaches take that step to at least communicate that type of movement it will do a lot to diffuse drama. Again you do not have to be the best of friends to call and say Suzy is leaving our gym and says she is coming to you. We wish her and you the best. Do not give the new gym any bad reviews even if asked. Let the new gym find anything negative about them on their own.

Communicate your vision! This is the biggest area where many small gym owners and coaches "lose it." The Nehemiah principle states that vision must be recast every 52 days. While you may not want to go 52 days at least once a quarter they should hear directly from the owners as to the vision of the gym by some format - letter, meeting, focus groups, website, e-mail, etc. Too many owners just assume because people walk through the door and smile when they are there that they will be there forever. Or think that because they were a good cheerleader, they will be a good owner. Don't ever get so busy that you can tell those who pay you $$$ and those you pay $$$ what the plan is. Let your parents, athletes and staff know the plan, signposts they can look for on the way, and by all means allow them to get off the train if they are not comfortable with your vision. Make sure your coaches and teachers are effective and on your page. Get rid of dead weight - staff, classes. programs and sometimes students. BTW "to win" is not a plan - it should only be a signpost on the journey to a greater destination.

 

[kickdblcj]

Don't post the mug shot from the owner's DUI on the gym's facebook page...

HAHAHAHA

 

[My3KidsMom]

I'd also like to add that former Coaches and Owners who say they "care" about the kids they coach need to understand what that means. It means that you support them even if they are no longer with you, that you genuinely CARE about how they are doing and wish them the best. I see it far to often where the coaches/owners say they care and support only to prove they don't really. Through all my years in all-stars I have learned that all-stars can be an ugly thing and friendships aren't always what they seem. Makes me sad but another life lesson learned. I don't care where anyone goes or what they do, as long as my kids are happy and where they want to be.

 

[MissBee]

Don't post the mug shot from the owner's DUI on the gym's facebook page...

Maybe not appropriate, but darn funny.

If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

 

[libertycoach]

If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

Love that!

 

[MyDaughterCheers]

I agree with all of the above advice, but have to point out that sometimes no matter how much class you try to leave with, others won't let you. If that happens, you just have to hold your head up and own your decision. Never ever go to your new gym and badmouth the old one. It seriously makes you look foolish that you chose to be a part of that gym for however long you were there. And coaches, never ever badmouth the athlete that left and say he/she doesn't belong on their new team or that they have no skill. It seriously makes you look foolish - aren't YOU the one who coached him/her for the past however many years?

 

[cheermommaRN]

For parents...just be honest...with the owners, coaches, and other parents. If you lie it will eventually be ferreted out, either by other parents or you'll be spotted by your old gym. There is no shame in leaving a gym because you want a more age appropriate team for your child, but be upfront, you never know what a coach is planning for the next year and it may include the team you were looking for.
Owners/Coaches...Don't burn a bridge, you never know if or when that athlete may want to come back. If they have the integrity to be honest with you, then have the integrity to stay professional. Our old gym in AZ had a very bad habit of taking it personally when kids left...even to the point of ignoring athletes at competitions or flat telling them if they left they could never come back.

 

[onebrokemama]

We left a gym and did all of the above, we see them at comps and ALMOST everyone is friendly and happy to see us when we run into them. There are always a few sour grapes. But I am guilt-free. In the words of Abby Lee Miller "Everyone's replaceable!"

 

[My3KidsMom]

We left a gym and did all of the above, we see them at comps and ALMOST everyone is friendly and happy to see us when we run into them. There are always a few sour grapes. But I am guilt-free. In the words of Abby Lee Miller "Everyone's replaceable!"

Lord please don't quote that lady on anything, I don't care how good she is she is verbally and mentally abusive to children and it saddens me. She is obviously great at what she does but to win at all costs is not a philosophy I would sign on to

 

[Flaming]

Lord please don't quote that lady on anything, I don't care how good she is she is verbally and mentally abusive to children and it saddens me. She is obviously great at what she does but to win at all costs is not a philosophy I would sign on to

My thoughts exactly! There are definitely some Abby Lee's in the cheer world, also!

 

[cupieqt]

tumbleyoda you and I would work so well together. I'm printing your post. I really like the Nehemiah reference ; )

 

[cupieqt]

Lord please don't quote that lady on anything, I don't care how good she is she is verbally and mentally abusive to children and it saddens me. She is obviously great at what she does but to win at all costs is not a philosophy I would sign on to

Amen. She is the grand example of the rampantly selfish and bad attitude-having, immature coaches that plague this sport. Winning is not the harbinger of success. Everyone just needs to listen to coaches like 'Yoda!

 

[Mamarazzi]

Maybe not appropriate, but darn funny.

If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

cupieqt tells me that ALL the time