All-Star You Need A Little Whine With That Cheese?

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Sorry, but I'm really irritated about this right now. So many kids and parents think that mandatory practices don't apply to them. I wish coaches would follow through more often. :(


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Oh those are my fave people.

There's always one who is at jazz/tap/modern dance camp and volleyball camp during skills camp and choreography. Doesn't really say a word. There's no real warning. Then they resurface after choreo with the sad face because they were center/point last year but aren't now.

In fact, they're nowhere in the routine because they were not HERE.

The standard party line is: I PAY! MY DAUGHTER NEEDS TO BE IN THIS ROUTINE.

Ma'am. You PAY for a uniform, tumbling, tuition, and comp fees. You do not "pay" to be in the routine.

I can't bump a kid out of a routine who has faithfully been HERE every single day just for Suzie who has been at *insert activity here* for half the month.
 
Back when CP was balancing AS cheer and soccer, she was approached about advancing to a level 5 team and crossing over to fly on coed. We had to think long and hard about her decision because of a number of factors: she was really reaching her peak in soccer (she was tall for her age and could outrun and maneuver all her opponents), yet she was really good at cheer and was excited with this new opportunity but both activities involved more extensive out of town travel and commitment. So we sat her down and explained to her that it wouldn't be fair to her teammates if she couldn't fully commit to always be a reliable member of the team given the expectations of both teams, so the time came where SHE had to choose between the 2 activities. Again, SHE had to choose. It would not be fair to anyone to expect her to commit only half her time and effort to each activity, while they gave all their time and energy to their sole commitment. She understood that, so...
She chose cheer. After 13 years of cheering, she now cheers for her college team and is on her college nationals team and competes on a worlds international team. Do we wonder where she would be had she continued to play soccer? Sure!! But she sure is a happy cheerleader who chose her path and says she doesn't regret the decisions she has made regarding where she is right now: living her dream!!
Most people can't commit fully to 2 activities so don't feel like you, as a coach, are making your athletes make a difficult decision. They have to decide what they want to do. I'm sure every coach, in every sport, feels the same way that you feel in this situation.
By the way, the discussion with CP's former soccer coach when she left soccer was a difficult but honest one, and you know, he was so understanding and kind about her explanation about her opportunity for cheer, and to this day, when he sees her, he tells her how proud he is of her success and her hard work and determination, even though it was his loss!!



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With coaching allstar cheerleading, you need every single member of the team in the gym every practice for it to be effective. Without effective practise, you can't be successful.

If you have say 18 girls out of 20 who really give their life and dedication to the team, miss every other activity for cheer practice - then you can't gamble the success of the routine because 2 out of 20 want to go to volleyball, dance or their aunts birthday party during choreo week, before kick off or two weeks before your nationals.

So it's not that cheer coaches don't "want to share". We can't. Because if i allowe suzie to miss every 4th practice because of her guitar class, her stunt group will suffer, her pyramid side will suffer and maybe she will collide in a tumbling pass with some other girl one day because she wasn't there when we had to change something.

Allstar cheerleading is all in. And one day you maybe will have to choose between allstar and your other activities if you can't do both.

If a kid on my sons soccer team misses two weeks of practice, he still can play at a game. The other soccer players still can practice and work on their technique although he was not there.

A stunt group can't practise without their flyer, or backspot, or base. Technically they can with someone jumping in, but they have to hit on the mat together, so they need to work at the gym together.





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Oh those are my fave people.

There's always one who is at jazz/tap/modern dance camp and volleyball camp during skills camp and choreography. Doesn't really say a word. There's no real warning. Then they resurface after choreo with the sad face because they were center/point last year but aren't now.

In fact, they're nowhere in the routine because they were not HERE.

The standard party line is: I PAY! MY DAUGHTER NEEDS TO BE IN THIS ROUTINE.

Ma'am. You PAY for a uniform, tumbling, tuition, and comp fees. You do not "pay" to be in the routine.

I can't bump a kid out of a routine who has faithfully been HERE every single day just for Suzie who has been at *insert activity here* for half the month.
So you don't charge your parents for stunt and/or choreography camps/music?

Stunt and choreo are mandatory. If they don't show, it will be choreographed with the ones that do. The rest can nugget as far as I'm concerned, but the owners feel differently. The missing ones will be put in the routine but I will not give them key positions.

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Let me clarify.

Yes, their fees pay for that, but the prevailing line of thought becomes "I paid for this = she goes into the routine in an integral position whether she was here for it or not."

That is false.

Honestly, if you're so passionate about having paid for something, you should have your kid here every day for it. I can only work with who is here.

All of that to say, your payment toward camp/choreo doesn't guarantee a spot.

Missing child gets a one way ticket to the other side of the blue mat. Or to Nuggetville, USA.
 
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Our HS made it easy-- they do not allow girls to cheer both AllStar and HS. CP and her teammates love competing, and the HS team is probably 95% sideline based, so their choice was easy.

Trust me we tried to get this rule passed for our high school. Unfortunately our AD didn't have a pair and was afraid of the backlash he would receive from parents if that rule was to go into effect.


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Trust me we tried to get this rule passed for our high school. Unfortunately our AD didn't have a pair and was afraid of the backlash he would receive from parents if that rule was to go into effect.

Funny, parents here tried the opposite approach. The current coach takes more of an advisory role. She allows the senior girls to basically run the team. Something that girls won't necessarily do well without much adult support. I know two girls my CP's age quit the team either in summer before the season even started, or after football. Apparently the bullying/hazing is out of control. Parents have been asking the AD for a new coach for years.
 
Our gym is very supportive of HS Cheer and really try to work with the HS coaches and most of the HS coaches do the same. Our HS season is Aug - Nov, with basketball games for some HS. Once November comes around, it is expected by coaches and most of the parents (especially on level 5) that all star comes first. Unfortunately, this year, we had some on the team who decided they could also compete on their HS gymnastics team. There were a few missed practices, but the biggest thing we encountered were injuries/fatigue. Of course, those parents/athletes swore up and down it had nothing to do with the gymnastics. Who knows, but what is apparent is that two competitive/consuming sports took a toll on the athletes. A lot of the girls on the AS team felt that the gymnasts were not pulling their weight and not giving their all to the AS team. There were many comments that if they have that much extra time, they should be in the cheer gym working on their stunts/tumbling versus taking on another sport. As a parent, again, spending a tremendous amount of money and time, I feel the same way. When one of these kids misses a practice, if affects that whole team. When we are missing 1 girl, we cannot even really put our pyramid up as it is so complicated and interactive. At an advanced level, kids have to begin making choices. My child has had to cancel plans/miss parties/events because of AS cheer. If you ask her, she will always say it was absolutely worth it.
 
My thoughts...and some food for thought...

I have no problem with the above example of a child needing to choose between elite soccer and elite cheer as a teenager. I think that is the reality of life, we can't do everything. What I do worry about is the trend I have seen in cheer since we began... And that is that the little ones are having to choose to forgo all other sports/activities due to the commitment to cheer.

My feeling is that when a child is in elementary school (and before) he/she should be doing as many things as possible...working all muscle groups and seeing what is out there. I feel like the increasing trend is for 7-year olds to be in the gym with a commitment to their team and a couple of privates and classes ...all because heaven forbid they don't have their full by 8 and don't make the worlds team at 12! (And ok...before you chime in and say that your 7-year old Suzy is just the most uber passionate cheerleader and demands that she be at the gym 6 days a week... I get it! The thing is, and I speak from experience, is that the best thing for Suzy? )

I have watched cheer become a year-round, majority of the week, commitment. Again, I get that it is necessary to keep your skills up, but again, 4/5/6 days a week at 7? What ever happened to cross training? What is this level of repetitive activity doing to our kids growing bodies and bones? And does the "team" (choreographed) aspect really need to be year round? Let's think about how often routines are changed over the course of a season. Or what about those half year teams that seem to manage just fine in the shorter amount of time?

Important to note: Cheer is not the only sport where this is happening. I just think that having our kids "specialize" at younger and younger ages, is going to backfire in the long run.
 
It's not the coaches making kids one dimentional. Sometimes it's the parents. And sometimes, like in my case, it's the kid! I tried everything to get my daughter to try stick and ball sports! I'm a football mom and played soccer as a kid! Cheer was the LAST sport on my radar. But my daughter has chosen this AS cheer gig and puts her heart and soul into it. It's who she is.

I'm glad she didn't have to choose and found what she loves because juggling football, baseball and basketball like my son did was a huge burden on our family.

I think at some point these kids have to choose their sport as they get closer to high school because so many of them have become year-round sports. Football isn't just July to November anymore. They train year round. And those boys who play baseball? Well, they're behind by the times they join the team because plays have been taught and positions are starting to be assigned, etc. (Just an example)
My poor parents put me in every sport under the moon and I quit them all until I found cheer! I guess I was lucky in a way because I always knew cheer was #1 to me because it just clicked, and never had to make a tough decision between that and other activities. Negative side...I guess I'm a one trick pony :p.
 
Oh those are my fave people.

There's always one who is at jazz/tap/modern dance camp and volleyball camp during skills camp and choreography. Doesn't really say a word. There's no real warning. Then they resurface after choreo with the sad face because they were center/point last year but aren't now.

In fact, they're nowhere in the routine because they were not HERE.

The standard party line is: I PAY! MY DAUGHTER NEEDS TO BE IN THIS ROUTINE.

Ma'am. You PAY for a uniform, tumbling, tuition, and comp fees. You do not "pay" to be in the routine.

I can't bump a kid out of a routine who has faithfully been HERE every single day just for Suzie who has been at *insert activity here* for half the month.

Where are you?!?!?!?!?!Can my CP cheer for you?!?!?!?!?!
 
My poor parents put me in every sport under the moon and I quit them all until I found cheer! I guess I was lucky in a way because I always knew cheer was #1 to me because it just clicked, and never had to make a tough decision between that and other activities. Negative side...I guess I'm a one trick pony :p.

That's what we've done with our daughter. But she would only commit to actually signing up for soccer and that was after I begged her to try it. I never thought I'd have a kid that would actually watch the ball roll by! LOL! Well, at least she knew what she wanted to do. :D
 
I'm more lenient with my minis because I know they need to participate in other activities. Cheer comes first 90% of the time, but an absence for karate belting or a father daughter dance is typically excused if it isn't 1. right before competition and 2. you tell me way ahead of time.

When kids miss a lot of practice, I like to remind the parents how much they pay. "You pay way too much for Suzie to be here 60% of the time and let her team lose."
 
Important to note: Cheer is not the only sport where this is happening. I just think that having our kids "specialize" at younger and younger ages, is going to backfire in the long run.

Yes! Soccer is huge in our area, and the number of indoor "training gym" type places has mushroomed in the last 10 years. Same with baseball. Used to be that there was Little League in the spring. If you didn't make All Star, you were done by mid to late June. Now there's LL, LL All Star, travel team, fall ball.... all this at/before middle school age where the kids are just being introduced to school sports.
 
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