All-Star You Need A Little Whine With That Cheese?

[Fiercecheermom]

Yes! Soccer is huge in our area, and the number of indoor "training gym" type places has mushroomed in the last 10 years. Same with baseball. Used to be that there was Little League in the spring. If you didn't make All Star, you were done by mid to late June. Now there's LL, LL All Star, travel team, fall ball.... all this at/before middle school age where the kids are just being introduced to school sports.

Same here....we used to joke if you aren't the "best of the best" at 7, you better pick another sport LOL. Seems like so many kids "major" in a sport by the time they are 8/9. I wanted her to try other things..ie: dance, gymnastics, baton twirling, etc. Spent a lot of money on those, only to listen to her complain about how much she hated them. Cheer has always been her passion. I suppose that is why she has excelled because she loves it so much.

 

[Twinklestars]

Funny, parents here tried the opposite approach. The current coach takes more of an advisory role. She allows the senior girls to basically run the team. Something that girls won't necessarily do well without much adult support. I know two girls my CP's age quit the team either in summer before the season even started, or after football. Apparently the bullying/hazing is out of control. Parents have been asking the AD for a new coach for years.

This was how it was at our previous school. This past year was better than the first year as far as the bullying because the captain didn't allow it.

No rising seniors are returning to cheer though. They didn't want to deal with it any longer.


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[cheerisloving]

The fact that I wanted to have a high school experiences like go to football and basketball games, parties, do theater and just enjoy my teenage years, kept me from all star in HS. I hated this because I wanted to compete and be in the gym every week but I wanted to be with my friends, and as my skills got to the higher level, I realized the commitment was going to be impossible.

You can't do it all, and if you can figure out a want to do it you have to take the consequence. But it's so unfortunate that once you get on world teams/higher levels, you sell your freedom.

 

[Dixie]

@MissCongeniality once again, we share a brain.
I don't get the all or nothing involved in being dedicated to any activity. My experience with AAA hockey, club baseball and AS Cheer:
1. Most of these kids have the drive, dedication and skill set to compete without being pushed by coaches and parents. (My daughter taught me that lesson at an open gym last week. After not even a cartwheel in 84 days, she threw the same arabian through to double she was doing in January.:eek: How is that possible without 5 practices a week?)
2. These type of kids pressure themselves without adults doing it to them. This year I've heard more of threats, removals, re-tryouts, injuries, quitting, and burnout. My kid was #10 of the original 30 to leave the team. After living for cheer for years - Done. Couldn't take it one more day. I've heard at least 2 have followed her. To my knowledge that has never happened. To me, something has changed and it isn't working. Sports psychologist? When did that become a booming profession?
3. Cross training can benefit your body. Track and soccer are great stamina builders for less cardio inducing sports. Baseball and Tennis build hand/eye coordination. Yoga teaches kids about their muscles and how to strengthen and isolate them. Children's bodies cannot take repetitive motion for hours on end every day. I just look at her four close friends who were trying to get that double to stay on their team and have now had ACL surgery (since October) and I think the pushing has hit an extreme and a line has been crossed somewhere. Why are so many children seeing a Chiropractor before my 40 year old self is? What's with all the braces, boots, and ice packs on children? A baseline concussion test? Why are concussions that prevalent that we need to know what their brain looked like before they started playing that sport?
4. Most kids don't want to miss practice any more than the coach wants them to. But, having to miss one practice for homecoming, SAT testing, a funeral, or NHS induction with advanced notice to the coach shouldn't be the end of their career or cause panic attacks the entire time they are gone. Practices are 4-5 days a week with travel many weekends for 8 months out of the year. That doesn't leave much wiggle room for anything. Another 'mandatory' practice added in the night before? Hope you can make it or you're banished to the sub spot. Heaven forbid you have to miss that one practice in months for work/school/the plague and you just lost your spot (or at the least will be labeled 'not dedicated'). My son's hockey coach sent him to play in a tournament in Canada then replaced him on his line with state team because he missed 3 practices while he was gone:confused:. He was told its a team sport and he wasn't there for his team. How is that okay? I can't imagine being told if I miss one day of work Susie would get my job. And my job pays me, not me paying them.
These kids learn so much from sports. Why are some trying to push them out of it? At what point can they be competitive and still do-able? And for those who say it's a team and we need everyone there, yes you do. But I haven't found an athlete out there that can give 100% of their time to any team.

 

[GreenStormLucy]

Let me clarify.

Yes, their fees pay for that, but the prevailing line of thought becomes "I paid for this = she goes into the routine in an integral position whether she was here for it or not."

That is false.

Honestly, if you're so passionate about having paid for something, you should have your kid here every day for it. I can only work with who is here.

All of that to say, your payment toward camp/choreo doesn't guarantee a spot.

Missing child gets a one way ticket to the other side of the blue mat. Or to Nuggetville, USA.

I laughed so hard -
I want a shirt with that.
Missed choreo week?
Here´s your ticket to Nuggetville, USA.
^^

 

[Just-a-Mom]

@MissCongeniality and @Dixie yes! These are big parts of why my kids don't cheer anymore.

World's team? Yes. You need to be dedicated and be there. Want to be on a worlds team in 5 years? No, you don't need to be in the gym that much, yet.
Youth 1? Get over yourselves! No youth 1 team is doing anything that requires them to be in the gym 4-6 nights a week. If they are, then the coaching might be the problem, not the kids and their parents.

I do not understand this mentality at all. As others have said - doing a variety of physical activities is actually more beneficial than just one. Cross training in other sports is beneficial to the child's "main" sport. The fact that people are more upset about concussions and broken backs making their child miss cheer, than that cheer caused this kind of injury in the first place is also really disturbing. These injuries are inceeasing because of too much pressure to get skills and too much time at the gym. Even young bodies need rest.

Way too much trying to force kids who are way too young to decide what they want to do as their main activity. Can you imagine if you'd had to choose your college major by 5th grade and you couldn't change your mind? Let them try a few things! I know, I know...your princess was born to cheer and doesn't want to do anything else. Sorry - I don't think 8 year olds actually know what they want to be doing for the next 10 years.

Interesting note: of all the professional dancers I work with and/or that teach my daughter, NOT ONE of them started dance before the age of 10. Every single one of them started between the ages of 10 and 19. And they're plenty successful. It is not necessary to start something at the age of 3 to be good at it - as a matter of fact, I'd bet money that the success rate is actually significantly lower for kids who start at these young ages. They burn out long before they ever have a chance to get really good.

Truth: dance teachers and coaches laugh at people putting their kids in these things at such young ages. Their take? "Hahaha Well, if she wants to waste her money like that, it's OK by me!"

Lastly, and i always ask this and never get an answer... what on earth are yall going for? Why does your child have to have a double at 9? So you can brag to another mom? And ok, they want to go to worlds. I get that. But why do they need to go by their 12th birthday? And what is the ultimate goal? Why would you sacrifice your child's academics, their chance to do other things, friendships, basically their childhood, so they can go to worlds? Yes, by all means, teach your child to work towards a goal. But at the end of the day it's still just cheerleading (or whatever other youth sport they do). Take it down a notch. Unless you have some kind of prodigy (and I hesitate to even say that), relax.

Sorry. Rant over. Just drives me crazy to see the expectations of little kids, just to do one activity.

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[INeverStopCheering]

Coming from a coach's perspective regarding not being more flexible with our athletes/being willing to work with other sports/coaches:

Our gym operates in a county with 12 public middle schools, 11 public high schools, and 30 rec teams, not to mention the kids from the 5 surrounding counties we pull from, and that's not counting private clubs for soccer and baseball. On a team of 30 kids, it would be very difficult for me to coordinate schedules with every single coach out there. And if I give leeway to one, I can't fairly deny it to someone else. There's no way we can accommodate everyone. So it's easier for the gym just to say that when you sign on the dotted line, you are making this your priority over everything else. As previously mentioned, if you miss field hockey, the other players can still run drills, but your stunt group cannot go up without you.

Granted, we only practice one night a week in the evenings and for two hours on Saturday, so if you want to do another sport on the other 5 days of the week, go bananas. If your parent is silly enough to sign you up for rec basketball that has games at the same time, not my fault.

 

[oncecoolcoachnowmom]

Some input on what has been posted:

As much as I have expected kids to be present, I do not believe in "last minute mandatory practices." As in, I've coached at levels 2 and 3. Not Worlds teams. Nothing is so important in a Y2 season that I will just ADD a practice the day before. Everything follows a schedule. I always find it rude to just add a practice out of nowhere then expect people to drop everything for it (my YOuth and Junior kids can't drive so it was always on mom to bring them.)

It's important for lower level coaches to provide predictable schedules. Families have other kids and things non-cheer that they'd like to do. I also do not think Y2 needs to be practicing on the same level as Cheetahs. 3 days a week with one one of those being tumbling is fine.

Additionally, as someone who cheered before Worlds (as in, my first all star team competed when there was novice/intermediate/advanced), I always have to remind folks that THERE IS MORE TO CHEER THAN WORLD'S TEAMS.

Like, it is perfectly ok for your kid to be the one who practices 3 times a week, plays another sport, and ends her career at Senior 3. She's no less of an awesome athlete because of that.

Or it is perfectly okay for your 7 year-old to be working on BWOs on Level 1 all year while dedicating herself to her instrument or soccer.

I can't tell you how many panicked moms I've talked to who are freaking out over their kid being 7 and rocking the cartwheel all year on Y1 and asking if they need to up her private schedule to EVERY DAY so she can be Y2 ready by tryouts.

No. If Suzie is happy on Y1 with her cartwheels for 2 seasons LET HER BE.

Or panicking because Suzie wants to drop to half-year so she can play softball. So?

Yes, I know you want her to be Gabi by 10. That's not the path for every kid.

A successful cheer life doesn't = World's ring at 12. A very small group of kids will EVER have that. And that's ok.

If I could tell every parent one thing, it would just be that every kid need not be tumbling every single day to get to a full by 10 because Worlds is not everything. Focus on what your child wants.

If she wants Worlds/L5/college cheer opportunities, then let her take the lead and be the one to tell you she wants to be in the gym every day. Some kids are totally cool being Level 3 or 4 for most of their careers and maxing out at a tuck. Let it be their decision.

That was a long word vomit like post, but just my thoughts.

 

[AlwaysLearning]

I was a travel softball player so this cheer thing was not in my plans for CP.

If a kid makes a commitment they need to follow through. If it's a demanding sport they have decisions to make. Our travel soccer players that love travel baseball can't do both and most have to follow their heart and choose 1. Soccer works with many other sports except baseball.

CP has cheered for 6 years and is a level 3. She has chosen to do 1 team and other activities while so many crossed over. Would she be a level 4 at 11 if she spent more time in the gym? Maybe. Maybe not. I don't care bc she's been happy & hasn't burned herself out. For 5 years, she cheered while trying soccer, basketball, scouts, gymnastics, swimming, diving, figure skating & I'm probably missing a few.

This year she has chosen to focus more on cheer and spends 10 hours a week in the gym. She can't control team practice or stunt class, but she schedules her tumbling around her other activities.

I work really hard to help her balance her activities so she never regrets her decision to cheer. She misses one day a week of track, but we cleared that with the coach before she signed up and she never misses cheer practice except for mandatory school events and a summer vacation.

 

[12stepCheermom]

I think it's all in knowing what you can balance and still keep the commitments you're making. I don't think kids should be relegated to all cheer or nothing. That doesn't make for well rounded kids. If they're that gung-ho on their own that's one thing, but I think parents should watch out for spreading their kids too thin or locking them into one all consuming activity.

My oldest CP is very driven. Cheer is one prong of his plan for his future, and it's an important one. He's also the drum major in his high school marching band and (as of this week) was just promoted to cadet commander of his civil air patrol squadron. These things are all important. CAP meets on Monday night. That's a fatal conflict for us. If a team is going to have practice on Mondays, he can't be on that team and we need to find another option. He can miss very occasionally in a dire emergency (and has when asked) but he's the highest ranking cadet and the commander of the squadron. He's expected to be there.

Same goes for drum major activities. Granted high school marching season wraps up just about the time competition season starts so he might miss a practice here and there on a weekend for a band competition before cheer competitions start, but this is a school leadership position and a marching band can't compete without their drum major. He attended the national youth leadership forum on national security in September but I had a few dates I could choose from by his invitation and worked out the one I thought would dodge both cheer and band. But that kind of thing takes planning ahead. He was just accepted to national flight academy and we chose to apply to the one that runs over Fourth of July week (figuring there's a good chance the gym will close that week or lots of others will be on vacation). Teams won't have routines at that point anyway so it's not a deal breaker if he misses one-two practices in July when people are generally on vacation anyway.

I say all this to say the most helpful thing a cheer coach can do is give as much information about the schedule as far ahead of time as possible when you have a team of kids like this. I think people will genuinely try their best to meet all commitments but I also think they'll default to first come first served when a conflict arises. Whichever date is out and on my calendar first tends to be the one I work around. Or if I've already said...this date he can't make in two months. So far we've been able to make this work perfectly fine, but it's not an easy task. And it stresses me out keeping his schedule. I'm a cheer mom secretary most of the time.

But, it's my job to help him achieve his dreams on his own. I just help organize and show him the path....and then pray he can walk toward his own destiny with the skills we've tried to teach him.

#letuspray

 

[CheerBank]

I say all this to say the most helpful thing a cheer coach can do is give as much information about the schedule as far ahead of time as possible when you have a team of kids like this. I think people will genuinely try their best to meet all commitments but I also think they'll default to first come first served when a conflict arises. Whichever date is out and on my calendar first tends to be the one I work around. Or if I've already said...this date he can't make in two months. So far we've been able to make this work perfectly fine, but it's not an easy task. And it stresses me out keeping his schedule. I'm a cheer mom secretary most of the time.

But, it's my job to help him achieve his dreams on his own. I just help organize and show him the path....and then pray he can walk toward his own destiny with the skills we've tried to teach him.

#letuspray

Can I get an amen to this!

 

[12stepCheermom]

Can I get an amen to this!

Kind of telling I posted that while watching our school spring musical which is about a kid trying to balance sports and the arts amid peer pressure :)

 

[oncecoolcoachnowmom]

I say all this to say the most helpful thing a cheer coach can do is give as much information about the schedule as far ahead of time as possible when you have a team of kids like this.

THIS.

In all my past seasons, when you come to the pre-tryout meeting, you get a sheet detailing the days of practice + times, comps (to the best of my knowledge), fittings, the tumbling schedule (not mandatory but included in price) and the almighty choreography week.

This way you know "Oh we have soccer Mondays. This may not work." before you tryout. Or "Oh, the World's teams are subject to having extra practices at coaches' discretion. Never going to work because we have 2 other sports."

The worst thing is when parents don't know these things beforehand, but as soon as your season starts, they have 12 things they need to miss for. You can't be mad at them as they were not informed. Or when you give them the choreography week dates the week before. That is not enough time!

This is also why I have never done EXTRA practices. You told people one thing and are springing another thing on them as if they do not have other things going on.

Sidenote: becoming a parent myself in the past 2 years (of a foster kid whose adoption we finalize this year, hence my year break from cheer) has really helped me to see things like this a TAD differently.

Ex: I now know how annoying it is when you know that soccer is T + Th and the coach says "SURPRISE MANDATORY EXTRA PRACTICE ON FRIDAY!" when you had other plans. Um. This is 6 y/o soccer. You cannot just spring it on me!

 

[Dixie]

@12stepCheermom I'm again amazed at your son being able to manage cheer and being drum major. Is he looking at the Air Force Academy? Our drum major just accepted an assignment there. You have a special boy!

I agree AS cheer is a commitment. No argument there. What I cannot for the life of me accept is when a coach calls a Saturday practice a week prior and is shocked when kids say they have the SAT test that morning and cannot make practice. It's September. They had 1 weeks notice. It's the freakin SAT exam. But, when they are told to be at practice or else, some skipped the test and went to practice. On Saturday. In September. Now one girl who went to practice finally took the makeup SAT in March and her scores won't be in before cheer tryouts for college. To me that is crazy.


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[12stepCheermom]

@12stepCheermom I'm again amazed at your son being able to manage cheer and being drum major. Is he looking at the Air Force Academy? Our drum major just accepted an assignment there. You have a special boy!

I agree AS cheer is a commitment. No argument there. What I cannot for the life of me accept is when a coach calls a Saturday practice a week prior and is shocked when kids say they have the SAT test that morning and cannot make practice. It's September. They had 1 weeks notice. It's the freakin SAT exam. But, when they are told to be at practice or else, some skipped the test and went to practice. On Saturday. In September. Now one girl who went to practice finally took the makeup SAT in March and her scores won't be in before cheer tryouts for college. To me that is crazy.


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That's actually exactly what he's been looking at since he was 6. It's such a long standing dream I truly don't know how hell handle it if it doesn't happen.

His plan B is NCSU and super senior ing on Coed :)

We had extra practice called on SAT Saturday but as soon as they realized it they changed the time so it was late afternoon. And being worlds month we just knew that cheer was overriding everything for the month of April. His squadron knew too but amazingly his sister has practice on Mondays and he doesn't so that worked out just perfectly :)

But his band scored "superior" at contest this week, he got promoted to cadet commander and it's champions league week so all in all hes having the best week ever!


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