OT Relationship Help

[farmers.cheer13]

I've been talking to this guy for about 2 weeks now, and before we started talking his grandma passes away. From what I understand they were very close. He texted me and told me last night that he didn't want to talk anymore because the death has hit him hard, and he wasn't ready for a relationship. He told me that he didn't want to hurt me by making me wait. He explained to me how much he liked me and I feel the exact same way. I told him that I understood where he was coming from. I explained to him that I liked him too much to stop talking to him. I asked if we could continue to talk, with the intent of dating when he was ready. And he agreed, but just to the taking, and he said "We'll see" on the dating. I guess what I'm really asking is for some help.. I'm getting all this advice from my friends but I need advice from people who don't know me.. So I chose this.. Can someone please tell me what I should do? I want to explain to him that I want to be with him and no one else. But I have no clue how to do it.. Please reply ASAP!

 

[cheerf5]

How old are you?

 

[farmers.cheer13]

14 and he is 15

 

[Cheer Dad]

Maybe a dumb question but do you know this guy in real life? Based on some recent stories I gotta ask.

 

[farmers.cheer13]

Maybe a dumb question but do you know this guy in real life? Based on some recent stories I gotta ask.

Yeah, he is.

 

[cheerforeverever]

Give him some time to grieve. Be a support system if he needs that, but also understand that this may be too many things going on at the moment in his life to process. You guys are still very young. If it is meant to work out, then in time it will, without pressure to make the relationship happen.

I promise you that when guys are interested, they will go out of their way to form a relationship with you, a.k.a "chase you" . Don't force him into a romantic relationship if he is pushing back from the idea. It will not end well.
In your situation, let him come talk to you if/when he is ready to start talking again. Don't keep chasing after him & try to make him have a relationship. Let the boy chase you.

 

[farmers.cheer13]

Give him some time to grieve. Be a support system if he needs that, but also understand that this may be too many things going on at the moment in his life to process. You guys are still very young. If it is meant to work out, then in time it will, without pressure to make the relationship happen.

I promise you that when guys are interested, they will go out of their way to form a relationship with you, a.k.a "chase you" . Don't force him into a romantic relationship if he is pushing back from the idea. It will not end well.
In your situation, let him come talk to you if/when he is ready to start talking again. Don't keep chasing after him & try to make him have a relationship. Let the boy chase you.

Wonderful advice! Thanks

 

[ashscott41]

You're young and I know it hurts, so my best advice is going to be to listen to Taylor Swift and watch bad movies with your friends and eat as much froyo as your heart desires. Its so hard to have things outside your control happen, but you have to respect that he needs time to grieve. Eventually he will come to terms with the loss of his loved one and be ready to move on in his life. Until then all you can do is support him however he needs to be supported, not how you need it. He will remember that you were there for him when he's ready to try dating again.

My only other tip would be to find someone else to write to every night. It's easy to fall into a routine of texting your crush at the same time everyday and naturally your thoughts will continue to go there. Text your mom or your best friend, write a letter to a soldier, make cards for sick kids or elderly people, find anything else to do to get your mind off the idea that you want to talk to him. My best friend recently went through a really bad breakup and I've become her new texting buddy. We have the most pointless conversations all day, but I know having someone else to talk to has helped her so much. Good luck and I hope things get easier for you!

 

[Keep_Believing]

I promise you that when guys are interested, they will go out of their way to form a relationship with you, a.k.a "chase you" . Don't force him into a romantic relationship if he is pushing back from the idea. It will not end well.


That is absolutely 100% true!

 

[cheerisloving]

My only other tip would be to find someone else to write to every night. It's easy to fall into a routine of texting your crush at the same time everyday and naturally your thoughts will continue to go there. Text your mom or your best friend, write a letter to a soldier, make cards for sick kids or elderly people, find anything else to do to get your mind off the idea that you want to talk to him. My best friend recently went through a really bad breakup and I've become her new texting buddy. We have the most pointless conversations all day, but I know having someone else to talk to has helped her so much. Good luck and I hope things get easier for you!

This is so true, my friend broke up with her longterm boyfriend and fell into this habit of texting and trying to start new things with other guys, but all these attempts have fizzled. I'm her go to now when it comes to relationship and texting.

To OP, I would wait it out. When someone wants you but is being reserved, just hold out and see if they come back.

 

[cheerf5]

I would just wait. You're still young. Just go with the flow.